self reflection

What Is Your Definition of Success?

What Is Your Definition of Success?

Reading Time: 4 minutes

When you are asked what is success, what is your answer? Do you have a sure and ready answer or does the question compel you to pause and think? Most people have a ready, but not necessarily sure, answer to this question.

The most popular answer is either to be wealthy or to be happy. If this is also your answer, have you thought about how much wealth you need to have to be able to say you’re successful, or how do you know when you have succeeded in achieving happiness?

Wealth constitutes what you have when someone takes all your money away.

Jordan Peterson

If you pause and think about this question, then you might be considering what exactly being successful means. As a way to answer the question, let’s first try to define what it is not.

What Success Isn’t

Most people would consider failure as the opposite of success. But if you review the lives of many individuals we consider “successful”, most of them had their turning point to success after a series of failures, or right after a major failure or a combination of these events. Take a look at these people:

Walt Disney – fired from the Kansas City Star because he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” Formed his first animation company but had to dissolve it because he could not pay his rent. Went on to be nominated for 59 Academy Awards for his work.

Oprah Winfrey – born into poverty, was pregnant at 14, fired from her first TV job because she was “unfit for television.” Became the host to one of the longest-running talks shows on TV and now has her own media empire.

Bill Gates – his first company with two other partners failed but this didn’t stop him from trying again. He founded Microsoft, one of the worlds biggest companies and he is now one of the wealthiest men in the world.

JK Rowling – found herself divorced, on welfare and with a child to support by the time she finished her first book. Her book was rejected by all 12 major publishers until a year later when Bloomsbury accepted it and gave her a small advance fee. Her series of books is still enjoying huge success.

Failure is Part of Success

Success is not final; failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.

— Winton S. Churchill

From these few examples, there are some noticeable patterns for achieving success:

  • Failure is just a stepping stone to success.
  • Focusing on a major goal and not giving up is important.
  • Success is not concentrated in just one career path or industry.
  • Wealth is a consequence of achieving success.

An important thing to take note of is that each of them had different major goals in life based on their personal talents or interest or what we may call as their passion. They set out to do something which they already love to do. This fueled them to keep on working even when facing setbacks.

Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.

— Winston S. Churchill

Although their goals were personal to them, it also had a huge impact on a large number of people. Their actions in pursuit of their goals fulfilled a need, addressed a lack that people were trying to find a solution for. This attracted people to support them and their activities which boosted their momentum towards their goals.

Success isn’t just about what you accomplish in your life; it’s about what you inspire others to do.

— Unknown

They did not set out specifically to become wealthy but it was a by-product of achieving their goals and thus, being successful in their particular field.

Stop chasing the money and start chasing the passion.

— Tony Hsieh

What Success Is

Using the observations we have from the examples we reviewed previously, we can define success roughly as follows:

Success is the state of an individual who has achieved a major life goal that they pursued diligently by overcoming failures, which also benefits a large number of people.

Obviously, success is something that you define personally, so you can reword this definition the way you think is more appropriate to you. The more important thing is that you understand the whole concept.

Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.

— Conrad Hilton

Arriving at a state or position in life where you can call yourself successful means that you have achieved a “major life goal”. “Major” is emphasized here, because in order to reach this goal, you have to succeed in the smaller goals first.

Think of it as succeeding in your daily health habits, like eating the right food, which leads to your success in your major health goal of losing weight and achieving a slimmer body.

How To Be Successful

From these patterns, we can further say that the method for success is as follows:

  1. You define your major goal in life.
  2. Your goals should benefit other people.
  3. You work diligently to pursue your goal.
  4. You don’t give up when you fail.

Now that you have a blueprint for success; it’s time to take your first step to determining your own definition of success.

Start Your Journey to Success

One of the first things you can do to start your journey to success is to define what you mean by success. There are many ways to go about this so choose the one that works for you. Here are some guide questions you can ask yourself to get started:

Take some time to think about your answers to these questions and write them down. An important tip while doing these exercises, and even while you’re pursuing your goals, is to maintain a happy demeanor.

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.

— Albert Schweitzer

This means that you “choose to be happy” every day and not wait to succeed to become happy. By deciding to be happy every day, you will be able to bounce back from failures better and you will be more open to learning from new things from other people and experiences.

We hope this helps you gain clarity on what success means to you and also help you take your first steps to your journey. Cheers to your success!


Feature Image: Original Photo by Ian Schneider on Unsplash.

Posted by H.J. Rangas in Spiritual, 0 comments
The Problem Set Challenge

The Problem Set Challenge

Reading Time: 3 minutes

An eagle rises above the storm by soaring above them. Similarly, we need to find a way to go beyond the storm that we are experiencing in our life. We need to let our minds soar to greater heights and figure out what we need to do to get there.

Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise above them.

— Washington Irving

Instead of focusing on the worries, let us try to think above and beyond the challenges that we are facing. Seeing the bigger picture will help us take a clearer perspective of what we need to have and do in order to rise above the storm of life’s trials.

However, in order for us to soar above a challenge, we need to identify first if our wings are strong enough to withstand the storm. Ask yourself, “Do I have the qualities necessary to solve my current problem/s?” To answer this question, take the Problem Set Challenge.

The Problem Set Challenge

Get a pen and paper and divide it into 5 columns. Name the first column Challenge, the second column Solutions, the third column, Internal Resources, the fourth column Actions and the last column External Resources.

Challenge

On the Challenge column, write down 1 or 3 major challenges that you are facing at the moment. Try to be specific and be sure to number them accordingly. Don’t think too hard on the order; just follow your gut.

Solutions

On the Solutions column, write down the solution that is necessary to solve the problem. Try to be specific on this as well. If you have more than one solution to a problem, number them accordingly.

Internal Resources

On the Internal Resources column, write down the resources that you will need to implement each solution. These are not material resources but the qualities that you will need to help you implement the solution. For example, if you’re problem is that you need to save money and one solution is exercise; one quality you will definitely need is self-discipline. Each resource may be repeated for each solution.

Action

On the Action column, write down how you will specifically implement each solution using the resources you have identified.

External Resources

At this point, you may add other items in the External Resources column as part of the requirements to implement the solution.

If you find that some Internal Resources are lacking, then that means that you need to develop these qualities in yourself. You may need to list this down as a problem that you need to solve first before the current problem you listed.

Revise your list accordingly until you are able to specify which problems need to be addressed first and the specific solutions to them. You may need to revise several times but try to come up with just 3 specific problems that you will focus on for the time being. Consider these 3 challenges and their solutions as your current problem set.

Whenever your preparations for the sea are poor; the sea worms its way in and finds the problems.

— Francis Stokes

This exercise helps you determine patterns of thought or habits that you may already have, or not have, that you will need to help you solve specific problems, not just at this moment in your life but also in the future.

Remember, before you can rise above the storm, you will need to ensure that you have the qualities it takes to brave the strong winds and endure whatever the storm brings you until you can go beyond it. But going above it is not your only goal. You also need to make sure that you have a plan on how to keep staying above it.


Feature Image: Original Photo by Dani Mota from Pexels.

Posted by H.J. Rangas in Spiritual, 0 comments
Smart Ways To Combat Boredom

Smart Ways To Combat Boredom

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Having a daily routine is a good way to organize your activities. However, when you’ve grown tired of your daily routine, or when your activities are cancelled and you suddenly have nothing to do, boredom can strike. Taking a nap is one quick way to combat boredom but unless you truly need it, it isn’t the best way. You can play games of binge-watch TV shows but they are not that productive. We’re sure some ideas have already popped into your head but why not try some more uncommon ways to spend your free time? Try out these smart ways to combat boredom:

1. Redesign Your Life

Start redesigning your future life with a list. Sit down with some pen and paper and ask yourself these questions: “What do you want to become in the future? What areas of your life do you want to improve and how?” Write down a bucket list of all the things you want to improve in the different areas of your life.

2. Create a Vision Board

Once you have a bucket list of how you want your future life to be, get some old magazines, scissors, glue and cardboard. Sit down for a bit and write down a paragraph to summarize what your redesigned life is like. Take note of the important keywords and find the images that relate to those words in the magazines. Cut them out and arrange them accordingly on your cardboard. Your vision board should remind you of your future goals everyday so make sure to hang it where you will always see it.

3. Set Your Financial Goals

If you’ve been itching to tackle your financial situation, now is the time to do so. Focus on what your short term, medium term and long-term financial goals are and assess where you are now. From here, you can determine what you need to do to move towards your goals. Make sure that you are making S.M.A.R.T. goals so you can measure your progress.

4. Create Your Budget

So you might have your financial goals set but how about your daily, weekly, monthly spending? How do you allocate your money each time you get your paycheck? The answer to that is having a budget and while no one budget system is perfect for everyone, you can start with the Money Jar Budgeting System and tweak it according to your needs.

5. Plan Your Meals

A healthy body keeps you going so you can pursue your goals further. So what you eat is an important part of your success. If you’re going on a diet and even if you are not, planning your meals not only keeps you healthy but also keeps your budget on track. There are ways to get the most out of your meals while saving money on groceries. If you keep these in mind, your body and your wallet will surely thank you. Plus, you can ensure that you and your family get to enjoy all your favorite dishes too.

6. Organize Your Clothes

A messy closet can be a daily scene that seems normal when you are always in a rush to get out the door each morning. Now that you have the time, why not be productive and spend it organizing your wardrobe? You might find hidden gems that you can wear on your next party or items that you don’t want to keep but your friend would love to have. Make sure to check if you have the basic items and make a note of what you need to complete them. If you have a lot of items to let go of, then you can sell them for some extra cash.

7. Compose An Apology

Do you need to say sorry to a friend or family member but haven’t done so for whatever reason? Now is the time to compose your thoughts and learn to properly say you’re sorry. The important thing is to be sincere about it. It would be good to write down your thoughts first and practice saying your apology. When you think you’re ready, contact your friend or family member and ask them to listen to you as you state your apology. Hopefully, your sincerity should win them over and you can sleep with a lighter heart.

8. Hone A Skill

Got a hobby or childhood talent you’ve never had time to practice? Now that you’ve got the time, pick up that guitar, paint brush and canvas, or that manual and start training yourself again. Or you can learn a new skill. All the greats started where you are now and you may not be aiming to be a professional in that field but improving yourself in something you love to do can boost your confidence and help you perform better in other areas of your life.

9. Start a Gratitude Journal

Being grateful is life-changing so why not start being grateful right now? All you need is your favorite notebook and pen, or your mobile phone will also do. Review your day, week, month, and write down the things that you are thankful about. Don’t discriminate between the small things and the big things, they are all equally worthy of being grateful for. You can do this every day before you sleep so you can rest with good vibes around you.

10. Go On a Themed Staycation

This is especially fun to do with the whole family. Since you’re stuck at home, why not indulge in a themed staycation? It doesn’t cost much and it can be fun. It can be a game night, a musical where you are all actors and singers, movie night with kids movies, starting a garden, a home decluttering theme, or even making a game of finding things that you can get rid of in your home. While some things may sound like a chore, if a delicious home-cooked meal is a reward, it should bring a sense of fun into the activity.

These are just some of the things that you can do while you’re stuck at home, alone or with your family. What other things do you do to help ease boredom at home? We’d love to hear your suggestions.


Original Photo by Roman Kraft on Unsplash.

Posted by H.J. Rangas in Intellectual, 0 comments
5 Ways to Handle Stress for Success

5 Ways to Handle Stress for Success

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Everyone has the goal of living a stress-free life but that is impossible and not very useful. We will experience no growth in life if we don’t encounter stress. If you don’t experience stress and conquer them, then you will never realize your full potential. You need to be able to master how to handle stress for success.

Instead of aiming for a stress-free life, we can aim for a life where we have more joyful moments and less stressful moments and whatever stress we may encounter is manageable. In the meantime, here are 5 ways to manage stress so it contributes to, instead of hindering your success.

1. Expect and Be Prepared for Change

Change is a constant in life so you should always anticipate it and prepare for it. For every situation you are in right now, think of what possible changes may happen in the future to change the situation for the better or for worse. Think forward and prepare for the possibilities. This way, you are prepared for change any time it arrives.

2. Look for the Opportunities

When we are stressed, we often feel restricted in our actions; put into a corner with limited our decisions. But there are always opportunities to help change things around. Instead of focusing on the limitations, try to identify the opportunities in the situation.

A work-related conflict might be an opportunity to push forward an idea you have long held or an opportunity for you to start a career in another place.

3. Look Back at Your Lessons

Review your life and see what lessons you have learned from the stressful situations you have encountered and handled before. Write down these lessons and review them regularly so you can instill in yourself these lessons you’ve learned.

You might even be able to identify negative habits and behaviors that contributed to putting you into such stressful situations. These insights will help you to change for the better so you don’t go thru the same kind of stress again.

4. Talk Positively to Yourself

Most people are worriers and when we worry we tend to look at the negative side of things. Change this pattern and look at the flip side of things. Change the “what ifs” to positive scenarios and focus on how that would feel. What would you say to yourself when this positive scenario becomes reality?

Imagine the good things in life more instead of focusing on the negatives. Pat your back and treat yourself when you achieve small victories. Remember that the thoughts you always indulge in will influence your reality.

5. Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude

Part of focusing on the positive things in your life is to learn to appreciate the blessings and opportunities you are able to enjoy. Schedule a time to recall the events of the day and list down the things that you are thankful for.

Identify the opportunities that came from stressful situations and appreciate that too. Write them down on your mobile device, a spreadsheet or on a notebook. Whatever way works for you is ok as long as you are consistent with this daily habit.

All these positive habits will help you manage stress better and move you forward to success much faster. The way you talk and think about yourself will also attract to you the kind of people and opportunities that will reinforce your thoughts and actions. So keep on practicing these positive habits to manage any stressful situation while still keeping a positive outlook.


Updated. First published in Pinoy Smart Living on 05.03.2019.
Original Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash.

Posted by H.J. Rangas in Intellectual, 0 comments
The Practice of Mindfulness and Its Benefits

The Practice of Mindfulness and Its Benefits

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Emotional health is not always easy to measure as people generally go through a range of different emotions from moment to moment. No one can maintain being cheerful all day or being sad all day. There will always be a break in the cycle. However, we can describe our general mood for the day. But is there a way to keep tabs on our thoughts and emotions and process them without stressing ourselves out? There is a way to do this through the practice of mindfulness and its benefits.

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is an innate human ability to be fully present and aware in the moment and not be overwhelmed or be too reactive by the things happening around us. Mindfulness is a state where you can focus on what is going on in your thoughts, your physical sensations, etc. without judging what you observe. In this way, mindfulness is a meditation method and sadly, we don’t do much of it in our daily lives.

Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgementaly. And then I sometimes add, in the service of self-understanding and wisdom.

— Jon Kabat-Zinn

Mindfulness is a quality that each of us possess. Thus, we should learn how to make use of it in our daily lives so we can experience the benefits. There are benefits in our mental, emotional, and physical states and even in our relationships and finances.

Benefits of Mindfulness

Mindfulness meditation provides us a time to suspend judgement. Instead, it gives us time to analyze how we think and feel, why we think in a particular way and why we feel the way we do. Mindfulness allows us to observe our experiences without judging them and instead look at them with kindness and understanding. This approach to understanding ourselves and our daily experiences has many health benefits.

Reduce Stress

Not judging yourself and extending understanding and kindness towards the self greatly reduces mental and physical stress. Too often, we punish ourselves for the things that we think we did wrong or did not accomplish. We rarely sit back and try to see why we acted in a certain way.

Encourage Acceptance

When we observe ourselves without judgement, we learn to accept and appreciate our flaws and weaknesses as part of who we are and we can more easily decide on how to change them to better improve ourselves. This also means, that we will be able to easily accept and even forgive not just ourselves but also the people around us.

Enhances Deeper Understanding

Being mindful and learning about our own inner workings helps us to better understand other people and through regular practise, we also learn to let things be instead of judging them in the moment. This means that we are still able to interact with negative people or still behave normally even in a toxic environment without being overwhelmed or being overly reactive.

Increase Awareness

Practicing mindfulness also enhances our awareness and insight not just of ourselves but of other people’s mental and emotional states as well so we can help them better in the way that they need most.

Enhance Performance

When we have a better understanding of how we think and act, we are also able to easily adjust our own patterns of thinking and our actions to align with our goals in the different areas of our life.

Practice mindfulness in your daily activities and experience the benefits in all areas of your life.

Mindfulness meditation is a practice that you can easily start doing. Find a quiet place to be alone with your thoughts and focus on them without judging them. You can also do the same type of observation in daily situations like during eating. Instead of just gulping down food, by being mindful of how you eat, you are able to appreciate the whole eating experience and appreciate its benefits. Try practicing being mindful of your daily habits today.


Edited version. First published in Pinoy Smart Living 08.07.2019.
Feature Image: Original Photo by Erriko Boccia on Unsplash.

Posted by H.J. Rangas in Spiritual, 0 comments