instinct

Jan

2022

Crossroads: Making Life-Changing Decisions

Reading Time: 3 minutes

My friends and I recently had an encounter with a black butterfly. The butterfly stayed with us for quite some time before flying away. Out of curiosity, I researched what it meant. Many people believe that a black butterfly is a sign of bad omen. But contrary to popular belief, a black butterfly is actually a symbol of rebirth, transformation, transition and new beginnings. When my friends and I saw the black butterfly, we were at crossroad, making life-changing decisions in our lives, careers, family and relationships.

Transformation

Butterflies undergo metamorphosis in their lives. They were not born with such beauty. As caterpillars, they have long and worm-like bodies. Caterpillars wrapped themselves in cocoons in order to become the beautiful full-winged creatures known as butterflies. In order to become butterflies, caterpillars had to fall apart and die first. Butterflies need to undergo a very painful process before they can fulfill their purpose and become the best versions of themselves. And this is the very essence of life.

As individuals, we all need to undergo transformation in order to fulfill our purpose in lives. Unfortunately, the transformation process is not easy. Challenges are needed for growth and success. Everyone wants to become happy and successful, but how many are actually willing to change? In order for our circumstances to change, we must be willing to change the way we do things and change ourselves in the process.

We can’t continue doing the same things and expect different results.
– Paulo Coelho

Crossroads in Life

Crossroads are all about change. It is about making choices. In a a way, it is an opportunity to choose between different possible paths that you can take in your life. The choices can be equally good and exciting or can also be very painful. Whatever choices that are right in front of you, making a choice can be quite scary because change is scary. That is why many people remain stuck at where they are in their lives because of fear.

Whether you are contemplating on leaving your job, changing careers, migrating to a different country, getting married or ending a relationship; whatever life-changing decision you are trying to make, it is not easy. Crossroads decisions are hard. They are difficult because it involves changing the direction of your life. Although it is a natural part of life, there are instances that it is forced upon us by uncontrollable circumstances.

So, what to do when you find yourself at a crossroad?

1. Accept What Is

Do not resist. You are at a crossroad because it is life’s way of telling you to rethink the direction of your life. Are you on the right path? Open yourself up to the signs around you. What is life telling you? Move with the changes instead of going against them.

2. Trust Your Instinct

An instinct is a feeling inside you that only you can experience. Trusting your instinct means trusting yourself. Sometimes, we spend too much time asking other people’s opinion and trying to adhere to the status quo when in fact deep inside you, you already know the answer. Just learn to believe in yourself and what you can do and accomplish.

3. Act on It

Once you have made the decision, now do it. Make the leap. It is useless to decide on your head alone. Your decision must be coupled with action. Whether it is right or wrong, only time can tell. Every decision has no guarantee. There is no such thing as a win-win situation.

4. Give Yourself Time to Grieve

Big changes are not without pain. There will be a feeling of loss. It’s okay to not be okay for some time. Give yourself time to cry your heart out. One day, it will all pass. You will start feeling better.

5. Surround Yourself with your Support Group

Find your support group. The people around you will help you get through it. They play an important role in your overall recovery. Their emotional support can help you reduce stress.

6. Look Forward to New Beginnings

The best way to move forward is to dream again. Visualize what your whole new world will look like. This is the time to create new dream s and goals. Dream big. Rather than looking at the past, focus your attention on your future happiness and success. Embrace the changes.

Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.
– Tony Robbins

Click here to get a free copy of the Crossroads worksheet.

Click here to watch the video.

Feature Image by Pexels

First Published 10.24.2020

Feb

2020

Improve Your Life Through the 5 Second Rule Challenge

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Do you ever listen to your intuition? The 5 Second Rule is a challenge for you to listen and do something about it within 5 seconds if you want to improve your life.

Intuition

Have you ever felt uneasy over something? It’s a feeling that keeps on popping into your head and does not go away. You feel it coming from your chest or stomach. Sometimes, it does not even make sense. It goes beyond logic yet for some reason you feel that it is the correct decision.

These are signs that your intuition is trying to tell you something. If you ever experience these things, you should learn to trust it.

Example, you met somebody. That person is so nice to you yet for some reason, there is something about that person that you are not comfortable with. Yet, you have decided to befriend that person only to be betrayed later on. Another example is you are in a meeting. A solution to the company problem kept on popping into your head and you get this nagging feeling to make the suggestion to your boss but you decided to keep quiet because you doubt yourself. And then somebody else recommended it and it was proven effective.

Life would have been better if only you have listened to what your intuition is telling you. It is how your unconscious mind communicates to your conscious mind. It is a manifestation of what you really feel inside. You can call it instinct, gut or intuition; but whatever it is, you need to learn to listen to it. Trust yourself and you will be surprised on how these little decisions can be life changing.

The 5-Second Rule

Mel Robbins, author of The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work and Confidence with Everyday Courage talks about how to utilise your instinct towards the achievement of your goals. She calls it the 5 Second Rule.

The Rule is simple. The rule states that you need to move within 5 seconds to do what your instinct is telling you otherwise, your brain will talk you out of it.

Check out this video from Fearless Soul to know more about it:

To summarize, according to Robbins, there are 5 elements to consider:

1. Know your Instinct

Robbins described an instinct as a sudden urge or impulse to do something. You will feel it coming from your belly out of nowhere. You will just know. It becomes louder if you practice meditation. It is clearer for people who are confident about themselves.

2. Check if it is Connected to your Goal

Before you stand up and do something about it, check first if doing it will bring you closer to your dreams/goals. That is why it is very important the you know what you want and that you have a bucket list. It is also crucial that you know what your priorities are.

3. Countdown to 5 Seconds

Once you have confirmed that following your instinct will bring you one step closer to your dream, you must learn to push yourself by doing a countdown – 5…4…3…2…1…

Remove all unnecessary doubts and fears. You have no time to worry about that. You only have 5 seconds to act on it.

4. Act on It

After your countdown, you need to act on it right away. Go ahead, stand up, don’t press that snooze button. Call that person. Grab that healthy snack. Talk to your partner. Make a suggestion to your boss. Research about it. Whatever it is, just do it.

5. Or “Your Brain will Kill It”

The moment you do not act within that 5 seconds window, your brain will kill it. When you hesitate, you are signalling to your brain that something is wrong. Then, you will feel scared. You will now put it off for fear of rejection or failure. And before you know it, your dreams and goals are now buried with it.

Use this life rule to help you achieve your goals and improve your life.

Feature Image: Gerd Altmann from Pixabay Images