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Sep

2021

How to Build Your Authentic Personal Brand

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Anyone can be an expert on personal branding. We know ourselves well, having lived with ourselves every single day. The reason we brand ourselves is simple – we want to stand out. “Personal image” and personal brand” are often interchanged. Personal image is the public’s perception of you, whether or not you do anything to alter your image. Your personal brand, on the other hand, is how you want people to perceive you. It is about reinventing your current image and transforming it to your own personal brand. If you are successful with your branding efforts, what people see will be synonymous to what you consciously and deliberately project as your personal brand. So, how to build your authentic personal brand?

You have a distinct advantage that companies do not. You have the ability to get very up-close and personal while companies strive to make their brand look more personal so that they can establish a relationship with their customers. This is the reason why celebrity endorsers, company spokespersons, and brand ambassadors are a six-figure commodity – companies piggyback on their personal image.

Building Your Personal Brand Through An Elevator Pitch

You are the perfect endorser, spokesperson and ambassador to represent your brand. The 60-second “elevator pitch” should be at the top of your playbook. This is especially useful nowadays where many first meetings and interviews are happening online. From an etiquette standpoint, refrain from doing small talks. The idea of an “elevator pitch” is to have a personal brand statement that captivates your audience in a few words. It is a simple exercise to understand yourself better and decide what you want to project to the world.

Parts of an Elevator Pitch

First 30 seconds

In the first 30 seconds of the pitch, talk about the following:

the first 10 seconds is for talking about who you are
10 seconds about what you do
and the last 10 seconds is about why you do it.

Who you are is simple – you could be a chef, an artist, an engineer or a business owner. What you do is more specific and goes deeper into your interests, talents, and abilities. Why you do it breathes life to your personal brand statement. No two people will have the same answers because we all have different sets of experiences, beliefs and aspirations.

Traditional personal branding stresses on self-promotion and ends on the 30-second mark. The result is an artificial egocentric image. If your personal brand is all about you, no one is going to care. Now, here is the secret to building your authentic personal brand statement. Your personal brand is never about you. Your personal brand needs to answer the question: Why.

Last 30 seconds

Should they care? That accounts for the last 30 seconds of your pitch.To help you arrive at a strong statement, let’s break it down:

Who do you want to appeal to? Your personal brand is all about them. If you don’t identify your audience, your personal brand statement will lack focus. The more clear and specific you are, the more effective your statement will be.
How can you help them? Now that you have identified your audience, it’s important to find out what they want and what you can do that will benefit them. Identify their problem and other possible solutions.
What makes you different? Surely, you are not the only person in the world that holds the key to solving their problem.
Why does it have to be you? This is the capstone of your personal brand statement. For this part, it’s okay to talk about you. Give a unique and irresistible proposition. This is the right time to showcase your personality, past successes and innovations! This is the stuff that icons are made of.

Your Authentic Personal Brand Statement

I am [who you are, what you do and why you do it]. I help [target audience] solve or address [their problem or need] by [your unique proposition].

When you brand yourself using this approach, your personal brand statement becomes YOU – organic, authentic and holistic. Your image will be strong, distinct, relevant, meaningful, and memorable. Suddenly, outside competition disappears and all you need to compose with is yourself – or your best selves.

Written by Pauli Antoine, owner and founder of Etiquette de Manille and Red Archon. As an etiquette and protocol trainer, she addresses important areas on image and impressions, etiquette and customer relations skills, all vital to building every company’s most important asset – people.

Updated version with permission from Ms. Pauli Antoine. First published in F&B World Magazine, August-September 2012 issue.

Feature Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

May

2021

Keeping Up with the Joneses

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Are you keeping up with the Joneses? Wait, what? Who are the Joneses? Well, keeping up with the Joneses is an English idiomatic expression which means comparing oneself to others. It is trying to maintain the same lifestyle or having the same material possessions to that of one’s neighbors or peers. For example, your neighbor buys a new car. In order to keep up with them, you will buy a new car also regardless of whether you need it or not. It also does not put into consideration whether you can afford it or not. Simply put, it is a feeling of not falling behind other people in terms of material possessions. That’s keeping up with the Joneses.

FOMO

With the onset of technology, keeping up with the Joneses has taken a new form. Now known as Fear of Missing Out, the feeling or insecurity has been magnified. We see people traveling, going places, eating delicious foods at fancy restaurants and buying the latest trends. It is human nature to not want to be left behind.

With social media, you get a constant view of the best parts of other people’s lives. You see the meals at fancy restaurants, the designer clothes, and the luxurious vacations. And if you follow any celebrities or influencers, you’ll see those types of posts all the time. It’s natural to feel a bit jealous and to want the same for yourself.
The Motley Fool

Why is it Bad?

We live in a highly competitive world. Most of the time, competitions are healthy because it propels us to develop and improve ourselves. However, in this fast-paced capitalist world, it is hard to keep up with everyone else. And besides, it is never a good idea to compare yourself with others. For one, it takes your focus off your goals. Second, in this vast world, learn to accept the fact that there will always be somebody who is more wealthy and successful than you.

The material possessions that others own are all part of their person a. What you are seeing is just the tip of the iceberg. You don’t know the whole story behind it. For all you know, the Joneses are in a track load of debt. It is not something that you want to get yourself into. And even if they can afford it, it does not mean that you can too. Every household has different management strategies. Your net worth is not the same as that of your neighbors.

Social Signaling

In psychology, this phenomenon is part of social signaling. Deep inside you have an inferiority complex or is quite insecure. Having a new car, branded clothes or latest cellphones all send “signals” to others that you are special. It is a way of getting an extra boost of self-worth from the material possessions that you own.

What’s ironic is that the truly wealthy do not act like that at all. Instead, they use what is called the counter signaling. Counter signaling means showing off by not showing off. Based on the analysis done by Dr. Tomas Stanley and Dr. William Danko of 292 millionaires, they found out that millionaires act quite the opposite. This was published in their book The Millionaire Next Door. Actual millionaires do not necessarily signal their success to others. In fact, they keep it low key. True, they buy expensive stuff but only because of their quality and not to show off. The most luxurious items in the world do not have big logos or emblems in their designs.

So, the next time you see your neighbor bragging or walking with their branded ensemble with large monogram logos, think again.

Love Yourself

All of us have our own journey in life. We will never be happy if we will forever be comparing ourselves to others. The key to happiness is to love yourself first. Know your self-worth. You are special. There is a genius within you. All you need to do is to believe in yourself. No amount of wealth, fame and fortune can contribute to your self-worth for it comes from within.

Feature Photo by Inga Seliverstova from Pexels

May

2021

10 Power Dressing Must-Haves In a Woman’s Closet

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Clothes are an important part of projecting an image of confidence, power and success. It influences how others see you. Although we should not judge a person based on appearances, it is a fact that people always have and will always judge a person by his or her appearance. That’s the psychology of dressing. That’s why if we want to become more successful, we must start with projecting a powerful persona. If you think that money is an issue in power dressing, think again. You can actually achieve that power dressing fashion style even when you are on a budget as long as you have the basics. All you need are these 10 Power Dressing Must-Haves in a Woman’s Closet.

With power dressing, you can strengthen your image. You can also boost your confidence level. When you look good, you feel good. This will ultimately lead to better performance. Yes, studies have shown that you can actually dress yourself up for success .

In an ideal world, you will have tons of suit ensembles and gorgeous outfits from great brands. However, for most of us, starting our day thinking of what to wear to work had become a part of our daily stressful lives. Here’s a short list of power dressing must haves that every woman should have in their closet:

1. Well Made Blazer

A well made blazer is good for topping off your shirts, dresses and pullovers. Every woman must have one that is flattering to the silhouette of your body.

2. Button Up Shirt

Definitely own a white button up shirt and a few other shades that compliment your skin tone. They never go out of style.

3. Crew Neck Top

In replacement to your button ups, this shirt cut makes you look smart. Yes, even a crew neck t-shirt will do. Just throw on your favorite blazer.

4. Little Black Dress

One of the legacies of Coco Chanel, the little black dress is one an essential part in a woman’s closet. Ideally, it should be in a decent knee length. It comes in handy when you are on a rush and cannot think of what to put together. You can wear it for a day in the office to a night out with friends. It is so versatile that you can never go wrong with a little black dress.

5. Pencil Skirt

A pencil skirt is another piece of clothing that never goes out of style. You can pair this with almost anything.

6. Cigarette Pants

Definitely, not skinny! It should be one that falls just above your ankle. They’re more flattering than the usual office / suit slacks.

7. Pumps

Every woman should have a black or nude pumps. They give a sharper look and elongate the legs. Wear something with about 2.5 to 3 inches heels to let you move around all day. You can also opt for a blocked heel for added comfort, unless of course you can do with the towering ones.

8. Tote Bag

When you are always on the go, find yourself a chic and roomy tote bag that would fit your work and personal essentials.

9. Scarf

To give your outfit a different look, throw over a scarf. Wrap it around your neck or tie it onto your tote.

10. Jewelry

A stud earring in diamond or pearl, a necklace with a pendant or a simple dress watch can be use to complete the look. Keep it simple and elegant.

Tip: Stick to clothes in Plain and Basic colors. They’re less noticeable when you use them on repeat.

MIX MATCHING IS THE KEY!

Fashion Advise given by Elisa Antonnette B. Locsin. Ms. Locsin is a wardrobe / fashion stylist for Filipino celebrities. She has been putting outfits for celebrities for their appearances on print ads, television, movies, concerts and other public appearances for 11 years now. She is also in-charge of putting together a particular look or theme for specific projects based on the celebrities’ roles or characters being played on television or movies.

First Published in Pinoy Smart Living on 09.03.2018.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

May

2021

Persona: What is Your Social Mask?

Reading Time: 2 minutes

We all wear a social mask to hide our true personality so as to conform to social norms. Whenever we go out in public, we always project a good image that exaggerates a version of ourselves. We do this most especially in front of people that we want to impress such as someone we like or a boss. We hope that by doing so, we make a good impression on them. The character that we play in front of others is our persona. So, how will you describe your persona: what is your social mask?

Your Social Mask

Are you the cool guy or the social butterfly? Or are you the bully or the control freak? Or maybe you are the martyr or the people-pleaser? What is your social mask? Think of yourself as a character in a drama, then analyze what kind of a character you are playing. How will you describe your personality when in front of others?

We wear masks to protect ourselves and to conceal something. The new normal entails us to always wear masks to hide our nose and mouth to protect ourselves and others from the virus. The Phantom of the Opera wears a mask to conceal his hideous face. In the same way that social masking is the role that we play in different social situations in order to meet societal standards. But is that who we really are?

We all have a social mask, right? We put it on, we go out, put our best food forward, our best image. But behind that social mask is a personal truth, what we really, really believe about who we are and what we’re capable of.
– Phil McGraw

Behind the Mask

When we are alone, we tend to do the opposite. We do things that are comfortable. We act based on our emotions and impulses. That is because there is no one to impress. So, there is no need to act. We are free to do anything that we want. That is actually our true personality. It is how we behave when no one else is watching.

Have you heard of people saying that a particular person changed when that person became rich, popular or powerful. Well, the truth is that that person did not change at all. What you have been seeing is the mask that that person was wearing. Who that person is now is actually that person’s true personality.

Money and success don’t change people. They merely amplify what is already there.
– Will Smith

The Yes Man

The problem with social masking lies when we become too engrossed in our roles. We begin to identify ourselves too much with the role that we play that we lose our sense of self. When this happens, we become a ‘Yes Man’. A Yes Man is someone who agrees to everything. This is dangerous because it leads to other people’s abuses. The Yes Man ends up sacrificing himself for others simple because he does not have the courage to say no.

You wear a mask for so long, you forget who you were beneath it.
– Alan Moore

Balance

The key is balance. Having a persona is good for it allows us to adapt to our environment by conforming to certain standards in society. However, becoming too engrossed in our roles is no longer good because we lose sight on who we really are as persons.

Image by Pexels from Pixabay

May

2021

Black Swan

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Who is the real you? Do you find yourself hiding your innermost thoughts and feelings from others? This is a natural behavior of human beings. It is because we are afraid of how others will react. There are certain norms and societal standards that we need to adher.. Society expects us to act a certain way. There are standards for beauty, for what is good behavior and what is successful. We receive harsh judgment if we do not conform. As a result, we become experts on hiding our true selves. We project an image to society based on what we think is acceptable. This is our persona. But behind the persona lies a different side that we keep to ourselves. The black swan is a metaphor that pertains to our ‘other self’ – the self that we hide from others.

Image

What mask are you wearing? And it is not about any form of physical mask. The truth is every human being wears a mask. In fact, we even wear multiple masks. We act differently in front of family, friends, boss, colleagues, etc. Sometimes, it becomes so natural that we begin to forget who we really are as a person. This is a natural behavior but if done for a long time, unhappiness will kick in because your other self will try to set itself free. It is also draining and exhausting to maintain a facade in front of others.

Black Swan

Have you ever experienced having it all yet you still feel unhappy? Maybe you are successful in your career but for some reason, something is missing. That’s the effect of trying to suppress the other self. The unexpressed part of an individual is known as the shadow. Carl Jung, a Swiss psychoanalyst, described shadow as the unknown dark side of the personality. Sometimes, shadow manifests itself through dreams and visions.

Slowly, I open my eyes. I’m in my workroom, it’s my studio. The darkness in waves brings agony but I’ll never give up. Inside I saw myself, myself…
– Black Swan, BTS

Journey to Self-Discovery

To be able to live life to the fullest, one needs to take the journey to self-discovery. Who we are as a person is not just our persona but it’s the combination of both the persona and the shadow. instead of suppressing the shadow, it is best to embrace it. Recognize your faults, weaknesses, inferiorities, issues, anxieties and even false beliefs. That’s the only way to conquer the shadow. It is only through this do we get to understand our true self and who we really are as a person. From there, we become conscious of the unconscious mind. Moreover, we give ourselves the power to control and improve our conscious mind.

Image by Irina Kuzmina from Pixabay

Mar

2020

Dress for Success

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Have you heard of the saying that you should dress for the job that you want, not the job that you have? While what you wear does not define your value as a person, it is a fact that what you wear influences how others see you. Your clothing makes a strong visual statement on your confidence level and how you see yourself. It is also a way to show respect not only to the situation but also to the people whom you are going to meet and talk to. Career counsellors know this well that is why they advise people to always look good and look professional especially on a job interview. That is why, you should always dress for success.

Studies

There are several studies that prove how your appearance highly influences not just how others perceive you but also how you conduct yourself in a particular situation.

In a co-study made by Micheal Krauss, a professor at Yale University and the Journal of Experimental Psychology in 2014, 128 men from different backgrounds and income levels were engaged in a negotiation game, acting as buyer and seller. The group was divided into three: one group in business attire, the second group wore sweatpants, shirts and sandals and the third group just wore their ordinary clothes.

Results showed that those who are dressed up ended up with the most profitable deals compared with their poorly dressed counterparts.

In another study on formal attire made by Abraham Rutchik, a professor of psychology at the California State University, Northridge; results showed that wearing formal attire increased abstract thinking. Abstract thinking makes you think more broadly. It enhances creativity and problem solving. It helps you deal with complex data and strategies making you feel powerful.

Putting on formal clothes makes us feel powerful, and that changes the basic way we see the world.
– Abraham Rutchik

So, the effect of dressing up affects not only you but also others around you. You gain confidence and you elicit the feeling of power. The observer on the other hand, could feel this feeling of confidence and in return will show you some respect.

Dressing up does not necessarily mean that you should always wear suits neither does it mean that you should invest heavily on clothes. There are many ways to dress up without necessarily stretching your budget.

Tips

Here are some tips on how you should dress for success:

Assess the environment

Do your research first. Where are you going? Who are you going to meet? Is there a dress code? If you are going for a job interview, find out about the industry. What do they normally wear? It is very important to wear the appropriate clothes.

Plan ahead

Don’t just pick up the first thing that you see in your closet. It helps to plan what you are going to wear the night before.

Stick to the basics

Normally, a classic and minimalist look is always stylish and sophisticated. While bold patterns and prints can work, neutral colours are the best. You don’t need to have a closet full of the latest trends, all you need is a few basic fashion must haves. Basic classic fashion never goes out of style.

Iron your clothes

Remember that how you dress says something about yourself. Showing up with wrinkled clothing gives an impression that you couldn’t care less. Perfectly pressed clothing is mandatory not just in interviews but in all occasions.

Wear clothes that fit you well

The most important aspect in dressing is the fit. The brand nor the price tag does not matter. Your clothing should fit the body perfectly. You want to avoid clothing that is too loose or too tight.

Dress comfortably

Dressing comfortably will help you relax. However, dressing comfortably does not mean baggy sweatpants or slippers. You can still wear comfortable clothes without sacrificing style. The key is balance. If you want to wear a loose top, wear something fitting for your pants.

Do not show too much skin

Never be overexposed. Unless you are going to the beach, keep your cleavage and your belly button covered. The less skin you show, the more professional you look.

Do not over accessorize

Accessories are useful in enhancing an outfit. However, if you wear them all together at once, it becomes a fashion failure. Be content with wearing just one or two. Invest in a statement piece like a watch, bracelet or bag.

It is better to be overdressed than be underdressed

Hollywood stylist Rachel Zoe believes that it is better to be overdressed than underdressed. If you are not sure what to wear, dress in such a way that you look like you have a very important meeting to attend to.

Be yourself

Lastly, don’t be afraid to show your individuality. Add a touch of yourself in your outfit whether it is the colour, the pattern or the accessories.

First published in Pinoy Smart Living on 06.25.2018
Feature Image by Stock5nap from Pixabay Images.