fear

May

2022

What Are You Feeling “Inside Out”?

Reading Time: 2 minutes

What are you feeling “inside out’? When you see someone smiling, we automatically know that that person is happy. In the same way that we know that a person is sad when that person is crying. That is because certain expressions and reactions are manifestations of what people are feeling deep inside according to Dr. Paul Ekman, one of the most influential psychologists of our time. It is possible to increase our emotional awareness by learning how to read expressions.

Six Basic Human Emotions

Dr. Ekman identified six basic human emotions. These are the following:

1. Happiness 😊,

Happiness is joy and satisfaction. It is a positive emotion. A person who is smiling is said to be happy and relaxed.

2. Anger 😡

Anger is a powerful negative emotion. It is characterized by hostility, agitation and antagonism. A person who is grumpy, frowning, yelling or showing any form of aggressive behavior is said to be angry.

3. Fear 😱

The feeling of fear is an unpleasant feeling that arises when a person recognizes danger or threats ahead. It is closely associated with our fight or flight response.

3. Disgust 🤮

When we see, taste or smell something unpleasant, we react by turning away, vomiting or covering our nose.

5. Sadness 😭

When something bad happens, we feel disappointed and hopeless. Sometimes, we grieve. We cry. We even withdraw from others. There is a feeling of wanting to be alone.

6. Surprise 😦

Unlike the other five basic emotions, the feeling of surprise is different in the sense that it can be positive, negative or even neutral. A surprise birthday party is a pleasant surprise while a black cat that suddenly jumps in front of you in a dark alley is an unpleasant surprise. When we are surprised, we widen your eyes and open our mouths. Sometimes, we scream and jump.

Emotional Wellness

So, what are you feeling inside out? Does emotional wellness mean we should be happy all the time? While our ultimate goal in life is to find happiness, it is impossible to feel happy all the time. In fact, the level of our happiness can only be felt depending on how much pain we had to go through and overcome in the past.

Inside Out

The simplest way to illustrate is through the Pixar movie “Inside Out”. The movie gives us a glimpse of what goes on inside our mind through the head of an 11-year old girl named Riley. Inside the control center of her mind are five basic emotions namely Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear and Disgust. At the beginning of the movie, Joy has an overarching goal of trying to dominate the rest of the emotions so that Riley will always feel happy. However, as the movie progresses, we will learn that true happiness is not just about Joy alone. Instead, Sadness also has a lot to contribute to a person’s happiness and so do Anger, Fear and Disgust.

YouTube Video Source: Pixar

In the movie, you will learn that all emotions are equally important. While our ultimate goal is happiness, it is something that should not be forced. True happiness will come in due time. And it will only come if we learn to embrace even the negative emotions in our lives including sadness. Yes, it’s okay to not be okay at times. What is important is how we can overcome the pain and rise above the situation.

Feature Photo by ROMAN ODINTSOV from Pexels

Aug

2021

How to Conquer Your Fear

Reading Time: 3 minutes

How do you conquer your fear? Technology has brought us many conveniences in life. It has also enabled more people to be aware of more things that they can both enjoy or fear from. The types of news we often hear from our TVs or online don’t help the situation either.

Fear is a serious issue that many of us are facing today. Some people are worrying so much that they have developed anxieties, panic attacks, even depression. Some fears stem from traumatic events and have become phobias. No matter what your fears are, living with it is not the purpose of your life. Taking steps to conquer it and be free from fear eventually, is the only way you can live a more comfortable, fulfilled life.

Here are some tips on how you can start to conquer your fear, big or small.

1. Acknowledge Your Fears

Unless you first identify your fears, you won’t be able to take steps to manage it. So ask yourself: What is it that I am always worried about? What is the worst-case scenario that I fear happening? What do I keep avoiding the most? Of course, if you have already been diagnosed with a particular phobia, then you already have your answer. Sit with your fear for 2-3 minutes if you have to. Practice mindfulness so you can better identify what triggers your fears as you go about your daily life.

2. Breathe Thru Your Panic

Realizing your fears often results in you being in a state of panic or being paralyzed into inaction. Either way, the first thing to keep in mind is to breathe deeply to calm yourself down. Several things will be happening to your body, to your emotions and even your thoughts all at once. But remain focused on your breathing until you reduce the jitters and you can think and speak clearly. Try meditation so you can practice breathing to calm yourself. Learn more about having the proper mindset in times of crisis to help you manage your anxieties.

3. Visualize the Positive

One way to help you cope with your fear is to visualize the positive side of things. Fear comes from a specific part of the brain. So use a different part of your brain to cancel that signal. Use your imagination to your advantage. Visualize yourself enjoying your life without your fear. Try to use the magic shop technique. What will happen if your are free from your fear? What will you do if you do not fear xxx? A bucket list or a vision board is a helpful way to do this. These tools also help you develop a more positive mindset.

4. Use Humor and Nature as Your Therapist

We all know that laughter and being with nature can help us feel better. In the same way, putting a dose of humor to our imagined worst case scenarios somehow reduces its negative effects in our mind and even emotions. You can do this by talking to your close friends and family members or watching a funny movie together or by yourself. Spending time with nature is also a great way to keep your mind off your worries, anxieties and fears. Take a walk in nature with a close friend. You can consider nature as an extension of you safe space. Don’t think of your fears and focus on the beautiful scenery, the fresh air and the calm surroundings instead.

5. Don’t Try to Be Perfect

The best way to conquer your fear is to do it gradually. Stop trying to be perfect. Do not expect to be free from your fear after one therapy session, for example. Be gentle with your self. Be kind to your self. Freeing yourself from fear is a healing process which takes time, effort and patience on your part as well as courage to keep trying. So lean in to your fears once in a while just to test the waters. Don’t try to avoid it but have supportive people with you who can help you cope. This way, you can measure your progress and learn more about how you can manage your fear.

While you’re trying to conquer your fear one day at a time, don’t forget to love yourself, be grateful for your blessings, to have fun, to keep believing in your self, to not give up, and to keep looking for the magic in your life.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Tim Trad on Unsplash.