etiquette

Oct

2022

10 Etiquette Rules to Follow When Dining Out With Friends

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Dining out with friends? There are social rules to follow when you are going out with friends. Follow them and you will have a great time enjoying each other’s company. Ignore them and you might end up wishing that you should just have stayed at home and watched your favorite television show. So, here are 10 etiquette rules to follow when you are dining out with friends:

1. Discuss How you will Settle the Bill Before Ordering

Unless someone is treating the whole group, the right thing to do is to split the bill equally. Go Dutch is a term that indicates that each person present should share the expenses of the meal equally. To ensure that the bill is split fairly, make sure you reach an agreement first before placing your orders.

Will you request for separate bills?
How will you split the bill equally?
What if someone decided to just order salad?
Will you split the cost of the alcoholic drinks with a non-drinker?

These are just some of the questions that you should settle first before ordering.

2. Don’t Order What you Want if Somebody Else is Paying

If somebody is treating the whole group, don’t just order what you want. Let the person treating order for the group unless that person explicitly tells you that you can order what you want. And even if that person tells you to, be courteous when ordering. Don’t order the most expensive items on the menu just because you are not paying.

3. Put your Smartphones Away

Unless it is very important, you should stay away from you phone when you are hanging out with friends. Keep your phone on silent mode. Come on! You are in the company of fellow human beings. Communicate with them. Why do you need to connect with other humans that are far away when you can easily do so to the person that is right in front of you or beside you? Just relax. Spend the time to talk to others. Enjoy one another’s company rather than checking your social media accounts.

4. Wait for Everyone’s Order to Arrive Before Eating

It is rude to start eating while the others are still waiting for their food. Wait until everyone’s orders have arrived before you start eating.

5. Keep your Elbows Off the Table

Although different cultures have different views with regards to putting elbows on the dining table; it is generally considered rude to have your elbows on the table. So instead of figuring out whether it is rude or not, to play safe, just refrain from putting your elbows on the table.

6. Put Napkins in Your Lap

Whether the table napkin is made of paper or cloth, there is a proper way of using them. First and foremost, if someone is hosting the dinner, wait for that person to put the table napkin on his or her lap before you get yours. Yes, table napkins are supposed to be placed on your lap and not on the table nor used as a bib. Leave the table napkin on your lap for the duration of the meal. Remove it only when you are going to use it to gently dab your mouth. Never use the table napkin to blow your nose! If you are going to leave the table, gently place the table napkin on your chair.

7. Pace yourself and Eat Slowly.

Pace yourself when eating. You are not in a rush. Enjoy the food and enjoy each other’s company.

8. Don’t Talk When Your Mouth is Full

It is bad table manners to talk when your mouth is full. You won’t be able to enjoy the food fully if you are talking while eating. And besides, if you open your mouth, the food inside can be seen by others. That’s not pleasing to the eyes. And worst, you might accidentally spat chunks of food to your listener’s face. Now, that’s gross!

9. Keep your Cutleries Down

If you are talking to your friends but you are not yet finished eating, don’t hold the utensils in your hand. Keep them down. Put them on your plate on an upside down V shape with tips towards each other. Avoid gestures with your hands while holding the cutleries.

10. Don’t Complain About the Food if Someone Else is Paying

If you have a negative opinion about the food or the venue for that matter, just keep it to yourself. It is considered rude to voice out your complaints especially if you are not paying. Just thank the host for inviting you.

Have a pleasant dining experience with your friends by practicing the 10 etiquette rules to follow when dining out with friends.

First published in Pinoy Smart Living on 08.05.2019

Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay

May

2020

Etiquette Rules for the New Normal

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Nations around the world are beginning to ease down restrictions. More and more people can now go out. As you take your first step into the world, bear in mind that it is no longer the same world before the lockdown. There are certain rules that need to be followed for what is considered the new normal. Here are etiquette rules that you must abide to as part of the new normal post lockdown:

Hygiene

The practice of good hygiene is essential for your health and other people’s health. It will lower your risk and help prevents the spread of the disease.

The following are the basic etiquette for proper hygiene practices:

Always wash your hands regularly. If soap and water is not available, you can use alcohol-based sanitizers with at least 60% alcohol.
Practice social distancing.
Turn away from other people when you cough or sneeze.
Avoid touching communal surfaces.
Dispose used tissues properly.
Do not share cups, glasses and utensils.
Always keep your home and work area clean.
Stay at home if you are sick.

Greetings

It is time to temporary forego customs and traditions for everyone’s safety. The new normal is all about touchless greetings.

If you meet someone, do the following:

Avoid physical contact. No hugging, kissing or giving handshakes.
Use other non-verbal cues when greeting like a tiny wave, a wink or a gentle nod.
Learn how other cultures greet each other. You can bow with hands by our side like the Koreans and the Japanese. You can do the Wai like the Thais by pressing your hands together like a prayer and slightly bowing.
Make it a habit to put your hands behind your back or firmly in your pocket.

Queuing

Queuing is something that we experience on a regular basis. We fall in line when we go to the bank, grocery, elevators, gasoline station, cafeteria, movie house and even to the public toilets. It is something that we are used to doing. However, expect additional queues longer lines post lockdown.

If you find yourself in a queue, do practice the following good behaviour:

Follow social distancing. Don’t stand so close to others. Be mindful of the gap. Respect their personal space. By doing so, you are protecting yourself and others.
Do not cut in line. Get rid of your sense of entitlement. What you need to do is equally important as the others. If you are in a hurry, you should have been there earlier than the rest. It is rude to skip lines even if you know somebody who is already waiting in the queue.
Keep your negative emotions to yourself. It is understandable that you are frustrated with the hassle and the long wait but you need to maintain your composure. Be patient.
Choose your line. Don’t stand in the middle of two separate lines. Just choose one. Stick to it and wait for your turn.
Offer your place to somebody else who needs it more like a pregnant woman or elderly. Another example is if you are in a grocery and your cart is full while the one behind you is just holding an item or two. A simple act of kindness especially in these difficult times can go a long way.

Wearing Face Mask

Wearing face masks is now going to be the new norm. A face mask serves a physical barrier and it helps slow the spread of the disease. It is not so much for the protection of the wearer from getting the virus but rather it is to prevent carriers from spreading the disease. After all, a great majority of people who are infected are asymptomatic.

Here is the etiquette for wearing face mask:

Be a good citizen and always wear a face mask when going out especially if you have any respiratory symptoms.
Wear the face mask properly.
Look people in the eyes when you are talking to them. It is a sign of respect.
Learn to smile with your eyes.
Do not remove your face mask when talking to others.

Stay safe everyone!

Feature Image by Posted by A.L. Jonas in Environmental, 0 comments

Feb

2020

Rules to Follow When Abroad

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Traveling to new places is a rewarding experience. Traveling also helps you grow as a person. However, you need to remember that just like in your home country, there are rules to follow when abroad. Your trip will be a more rewarding adventure if you try to follow certain travel etiquettes that would make locals appreciate your enthusiasm for their country and culture.

Don’t be that tourist who the locals would rather not be involved with. If you notice that locals don’t seem to be welcoming when you ask for directions, or any kind of aid, maybe you are making them uncomfortable in some way. You might even be disrespecting their culture or breaking some rules already and don’t even know it.

Here are some travel rules to keep in mind to ensure that you not only have a memorable travel experience but leave behind pleasant memories for the locals you encounter too.

1. Learn about your destination

Aside from planning out your itinerary, make sure to learn about the local culture, history and traditions. You might come across interesting trivia that are unique to that culture or locality. You can use this information as a conversation starter to interact with the locals.

Your interest in their culture might endear you to the locals you approach. You might even make great friends.

2. Learn basic conversational lingo + practices

One of the things you should learn is how to converse with the locals for basic information. Learn how to say “Thank you”, “Hi”, “Please” and “Goodbye”. Also learn to ask questions for finding a restaurant, your hotel, how to get to a bus terminal, etc. and don’t expect everyone to understand English.

While you’re at it, learn how the locals greet each other. In some nations, shaking hands is the norm while in others a bow or a kiss on the cheek is expected. This way, you won’t be surprised yourself (or feel offended) when a local greets you with a gesture you’re not used to.

Learn other important customs such as tipping in restaurants. In some countries, there is a customary percentage for how much to tip while in other countries, doing so is considered rude.

3. Don’t forget you’re just a visitor

When you go to another country, you are essentially a visitor and the locals are your host. So, just as you don’t want to interrupt your host’s regular activities; don’t expect local folks to make way for you in daily situations such as in public transport or in ticketing lines to a local amusement park for example, just because you are obviously a foreigner visiting their country.

Also, follow the rules in the places you are visiting. Rules exists for a reason and you may not need understand why but the locals do. Remember that ignorance is not an excuse to break the rules. So be aware of certain prohibitions in the places you will visit and follow them, not only as a form of respect to the locals but also to avoid landing yourself in jail.

Be friendly and respect the people and their rules and practices as you would in your own country. Locals would rather engage with a courteous and respectful stranger than someone they feel is demanding and disrespectful.

4. Dress accordingly

Part of respecting the local culture is to observe proper dress codes in the places you’re going to. If your itinerary includes going to a church or temple, dress accordingly. Don’t show up in shorts and a sleeveless shirt and expect to be accommodated. Similarly, if you’re going to a museum, make sure to wear something not too casual and don’t wear slippers.

Don’t be an obvious tourist by wearing sneakers all the time. If you’re not doing a lot of walking and hiking anyway, leave the rubber shoes at your hotel and wear comfortable day shoes that will still be appropriate when going into a local restaurant or a church.

Avoid wearing fanny packs (belt bags) as you might just attract pickpockets. Wear a cross-body bag instead. Also, try not to hang your camera on your neck at all times. Stash it inside your bag after taking pictures.

5. Be mindful When taking pictures

Aside from standing out like a sore thumb when you’re carrying a selfie stick around, you might also be disrupting locals on their way to their own destinations. Take a selfie using a selfie stick only when and where appropriate. Don’t disrupt foot traffic for example. Find a less busy spot instead. In places where elbow room is scarce, just use your mobile phone instead.

Also, selfie sticks might not be welcome in some museums and in other places, a camera flash might not be allowed either. So mind the rules and the situation when taking pictures so you don’t end up disrupting other people, breaking the rules or worse, damaging your camera equipment.

If taking pictures is not allowed, then respect the rule and just enjoy the experience. It’s better to take back great memories of your trip than a blurry picture that you took in secret, anyway.

6. Avoid comparing and/or constantly complaining

You travel to a new place to experience new things so be open to the new experience instead of comparing it to what you’re familiar with and complaining about it. Just because their traditional coffee doesn’t suit your taste buds doesn’t mean their coffee is inferior to what your country produces.

Learn to appreciate what’s different and try to understand why it’s different based on the local culture. It can be an interesting conversation starter that will allow you to learn even more about the local culture and practices.

If you have a controversial point or a strong opinion about certain topics like politics or religion, keep it to yourself. Discuss them privately with your travel buddies and don’t voice them out in public places. Locals might be sensitive to these topics and you might end up offending everyone who hears your opinions on these topics.

7. Be a nice human being

No matter in what country you go to, be a nice human being by respecting the place where other human beings live. Keep these in mind wherever you go:

Only bargain where appropriate. Don’t haggle for a bargain to the point that you embarrass and/or get into a fight (verbal or otherwise) with the local seller. Understand that some of these sellers depend on tourists buying their items to earn their livelihood. So as much as possible, don’t haggle too much. Especially if local artisans themselves are selling their hand-made crafts, pay your respects for their time and effort by buying their items at a reasonable price.

Follow the same consideration when it comes to booking local residents as travel guides, renting boatmen and their boats, etc.

Don’t leave behind your trash. Whether on the beach, on a mountain trail or in your hotel room; don’t litter. Dispose of your trash appropriately. Not only will the local residents appreciate you, the environment will benefit too.

Observing travel etiquette is an important part of your travel experience. By observing these rules, you can be a well-mannered tourist that locals will welcome in any country you visit.

Original photo by Alicia Steels on Unsplash