It is difficult to ask other people for help. People tend to want to be able to do things their way. Asking for help from other people means acknowledging that we alone are not capable of doing something. It takes a lot of humility to accept that. In a way, we are also surrendering control of the situation and allowing others to take over. That’s why for most of us, we tend to put off asking for assistance unless we already feel hopeless and we need saving. When this happens, another concern comes up and that is how receptive will the other person be. Just imagine how devastating it could be after gathering the courage to finally ask others for help only to be rejected in the end. So, what are the ways on how to ask someone for help to make sure that we can get it?
1. Ask with Sincerity and Humility
Asking with sincerity and humility makes you vulnerable. This in turn will trigger the other person’s instinct and desire to help someone in need. It is hard to empathize with someone who is acting extremely proud.
2. Be Polite
To be polite means being respectful and considerate to other people. If you are polite, you are more likely to achieve your goals. Use words such as:
- Please
- Do you mind if…?
- May I …?
- Would it be possible to …?
- Could you give me a hand?
- Could you do me a favour?
3. Get the Proper Timing
People are busy most of the time. To avoid being rejected, it helps to ask at the correct time. Don’t just call a friend or family and ask directly, ask them first when is the best time to call them or talk to them. In this way, you can be sure that you are not disrupting anything important that they are doing.
Timing not only pertains to the time but also the mood of the person you are asking too. Don’t ask someone who is in a bad mood. This will only increase your chance of being rejected.
4. Give Them Time to Think About It
If you are going to ask for help, it is proper that you give them time to think about your request. Don’t be offended if they cannot answer you right away. By giving them time, they might be able to come up with something that can help you in the best way that they can.
5. Refrain from Reminding Them That They Owe You One
So you have helped your friend before. And now the tables are turned. You need your friend’s help this time. If you are going to ask that person for help, refrain from reminding them that they owe you one. By doing that, is will sound like you are controlling them. It is like you are asking them to pay back the good deed that you have done before. If are going to help somebody, that’s it. There should be no strings attached. Helping others and expecting them to return the favor later is not helping at all. If there is a need for a payback, then that is considered a loan not a helping hand. Don’t make things awkward. Just ask sincerely.
6. Never Give Up
And lastly, don’t expect them to give you the answer that you are looking for. They might not be able to help you. Sometimes, they might say some things that you don’t want to hear. Be prepared for this. If this happens, it’s okay. Don’t give up just yet. Successful persons like Colonel Sanders and Walt Disney never gave up. You can always ask another person instead.
Feature Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay