H.J. Rangas

Jun

2023

What is the 7-Year Itch?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

What is the 7-year itch? Most of us have heard of the term when referring to couples having relationship problems. There are many stories of couples experiencing issues or even breaking up around the 7th year of their relationship.

Of course, this situation between couples also happens in the 4th or 5th years or even beyond 7 years. So 7 is not an exact number in these situations. Is there a reason why 7 is an important number in these major life points? Apparently, there is.

The Magic of Number 7

In astrology and numerology, all numbers have a specific kind of effect in our lives. The use of the number 7 is also prevalent in nature and culture, religion and art.

Astrologists believe there are major shifts in the cosmos every 7 years.
Biology states that human cells replace themselves every 7 to 10 years.
The Bible tells us that the world was built in 7 days, there are 7 deadly sins, and 7 seals of God.
Mystics and sages in ancients texts identify 7 main chakras in the body and talk about the 7 laws of life.
There are 7 colors in a rainbow, 7 visible planets in the heavens, and the 4 distinct phases of the moon are approximately 7 days apart.
Art has 7 elements and Shakespeare wrote about the 7 stages of man.
There are 7 continents and 7 seas, 7 days of the week, 7 unique notes on the common musical scale, and 7 directions.

The 7-Year Cycle

The number 7 is also represents different cycles in our life. The 7-year life cycle is divided every 7 years from the day you were born. Most of us have heard of the mid-life crisis which usually happens around 21-41 years. Think about your life as cycles instead of a linear journey. Notice that there are major transition points in your life that happens around every 7 years. These are the times that we tend to transform our identities and/or add on to the roles we play for the people around us.

Think of how we usually go through life. We usually start school at around 7 years old. We transition to highschool around 14 years old and graduate college around 21 years old. Somewhere in between these 7-year cycles, we go into employment and develop relationships. Finally, we retire from employment around 55 years old, which is the 6th stage or cycle.

We usually think of the 7-year itch as just referring to romantic relationships. We can actually use it to refer to our own life’s 7-year cycles. This means, that whether you are in a relationship or not; you will experience the 7-year itch.

The 7-Year Itch

The 7-year itch is that urge to undergo a change in your life. Ideally, this is a natural part of life, just as how we expect the seasons to change each year. However, most of us are pursuing our goals without this 7-year cycle in mind.

This is why we hear a lot of people often suddenly quitting their successful careers. They choose to do something new and very different from their expertise. Some people even downgrade their luxurious lifestyles. They suddenly switch to living a less hectic life in the province, near nature instead.

These people have experienced the 7-year itch and answered that calling, whether they are aware of it are not. Meanwhile, the rest of us are surprised at what prompted them to make such a major life decision. Each 7-year cycle is basically when you experience a crossroad in life. This applies to relationships too. This does not mean an ending to the relationship. Instead, each person in the relationship should grow and evolve for the relationship to also evolve further.

This 7-year itch is an itch that you need to scratch; a calling that you need to answer to. Otherwise, you will feel stuck and frustrated if you remain in the same situation even after the 7-year cycle. Some may even fall into depression. For example, people who stay in their jobs for more than 7 years usually feel this kind of frustration. People who hang on to their relationships even if they are already unhappy, and end up ruining their relationship and/or themselves.

The only remedy to this is to have a major change in your own life. Think of it as having a clean slate to reset your life. You need to have something else that excites you, in the other dimensions of your life. This reduces the impact of the feeling of being stuck and unsatisfied in one area of your life.

The 7-year cycles in your life is a guide on how you should flow in your life journey. Each time you are nearing the end of a cycle; take the time to review your journey so far and be grateful for where it has taken you. Then, prepare yourself to welcome something new, whichever dimension of life it is coming from.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Todd Diemer on Unsplash.

May

2023

Manage Your Energy Instead of Your Time

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Most of us are always feeling like we don’t have the time for everything that needs to be done and the things that we want to do. When we do get the “free time” to do the things we want; we find that we don’t have the energy to do them anymore. We end up trying to get some rest instead.

Time vs Energy

Time and energy are both resources that we utilize in our daily lives. Most of us are not aware that they are different. Time is a finite source. We all have the same 24 hours to spend per day. It’s up to us how we spend it. Energy is not fixed. It comes and goes and how it fluctuates throughout the day is different for each individual.

For example, some people are more active in the morning while others prefer to do deep work in the afternoon or even deep into the night. How many of us have categorized ourselves as “morning persons” or “night owls”?

Your Energy Factors

Understanding the different energies that we have at our disposal will also help us get clearer on how our energy works and how we can manage them.

We have different energy centers. For our daily needs, our main energy factors can be categorized as follows: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.

PHYSICAL

This is the most fundamental energy resource that we have. It is affected by our sleep, what we eat, our water intake and what we do for exercise. If you don’t feel like getting up from bed when you wake up; then your day is already starting out really bad.

A basic factor in our physical health is our breath. If we don’t know how to breath properly, then we won’t be able to use our physical energy efficiently. So take the time to slow down and breath deeply to allow your body to relax. Regular exercise also helps us to breath deeper and increase our physical energy.

Make sure to drink lots of water and eat properly throughout the day. Eating properly means avoiding junkfood and instead focusing on foods that can provide you with optimum nutrition. Don’t let yourself go hungry but don’t get too full from eating either so you don’t end up sleepy.

EMOTIONAL

How we feel throughout the day can greatly affect our productivity and the quality of our work. Our emotional energy can affect our own personal forecast for our whole day or our whole week. Just like with our physical body, we also need to regulate our emotional energy and take time to refuel it.

We all know that negative energy can make us feel down and stressed out so we end up unproductive. However, avoiding negative experiences and hiding from toxic people is not a good long-term strategy. Instead, acknowledging these situations is the first step to finding a solution.

How do you refuel from emotionally draining situations? Just go back to doing the things that you enjoy or the things that are deeply relaxing for you. For example, put on some upbeat music and just move your body if you love dancing. Or take the time to read a few pages of your favorite book to relax.

MENTAL

Our mental energy can deeply affect our concentration during work. If we don’t have enough mental energy; it will be hard for us to focus on the details of our work. It will also be hard to see how our work can contribute to the big picture; because we might not even be able to imagine the significance of it.

With low mental energy, our inner dialogue can also turn negative instead of optimistic. We will find it hard to focus on a conversation with a friend in the din of a cafeteria for example, when at other times, this response is almost automatic.

To refuel mentally, we need to manage what we consume mentally as well. Your choices will depend on the type of innate intelligence you have. What type of music and books do you consume? What topics do you browse on social media? What topics do you and your friends mostly talk about? Hopefully, they are all topics that help you motivate yourself to do better and give you a more optimistic view of the world. If you end up with more frustration and self-doubt from these experiences; then it’s time to rethink your choices.

SPIRITUAL

Our spiritual energy has a lot to do with fulfilling our sense of purpose and our values. If our actions don’t align with our deepest core values and don’t align with our personal interest or life purpose; then we will find ourselves lacking the energy to do our work.

Just like all the other factors, we also need to replenish our spiritual energy. We can do this by setting aside “alone time” for some reflection where we can further explore our values and purpose. This can be done through meditation, yoga, reading a good book, sound therapy and other things that can help you calm down and find your inner peace.

We can also replenish our spiritual energy by reaching to others and offering our time or assistance in some way. Spending time with our loved ones is also a fulfilling spiritual experience.

Managing Your Energy

It is important to learn your own energy patterns on a daily basis. This will allow you to identify what time of day you are most energetic and when you are in low battery mode. Keep track of your energy fluctuations in a journal. This way, you can finally figure out if you truly are a morning person or a night owl.

Once you do this, you can also schedule your activities according to your patterns. This might not be easy to do in an office setting but you can start to make small tweaks to your schedule first. Your goal is to be more productive than ever so that you won’t have any issues with your own work schedule.

As you may have noticed, each factor is interconnected, and external experiences impact our overall well-being. Nurturing relationships, social interactions, work-life balance, and financial stability are essential aspects to consider in maintaining optimal energy levels. By managing our energy effectively, we can enhance productivity, pursue our passions, and lead more fulfilling lives.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Yingchih on Unsplash.

May

2023

5 Spiritual Practices to Redesign and Transform Your Life

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Do you follow a spiritual practice? Spirituality is a journey, not a destination. It is a lifelong process of learning and growing, of connecting with something larger than ourselves. Spiritual practices can help us to align with our design and purpose, and live more fulfilling and meaningful lives.

Here are 5 spiritual practices that you can do every day to redesign and transform your life:

Meditation

Meditation is a spiritual practice of focusing your attention on the present moment. It can help to reduce stress, improve focus, and increase self-awareness. It can help you get to know yourself better and develop mindfulness that allows you to gain a deeper understanding of those around you. Practicing meditation can also help you on your journey to find your inner peace. There are many different types of meditation, so find one that works for you and make time for it every day.

Prayer

Prayer is a way of communicating with a higher power. It can be a way to communicate with your inner child or inner self. You can look at it as “self talk” that allows you to practice self love. It can be a way to express gratitude, ask for help, or simply connect with something larger than yourself. You can pray for guidance or a blessing for your goals; for the health of you and your family, and for forgiveness for yourself as well as for others. There is no right or wrong way to pray, so find a way that feels comfortable for you and do it every day.

Gratitude

Gratitude is the spiritual practice of focusing on the good things in your life and sharing it too. It can help to improve your mood, increase your happiness, and make you more resilient. It can be as simple as giving back through tithing. Having a positive attitude and being grateful for the lesson is also a helpful way to manage your emotions especially during tough times. There are many different ways to practice gratitude, such as keeping a gratitude journal or simply taking a few moments each day to think about the things you are grateful for.

Service

Service is the act of helping others. It can be a way to connect with your community, make a difference in the world, and feel good about yourself. You can help your loved ones feel better just by learning their love language and expressing your care for them that way. Helping in times of crisis is one way to be of service to others and to deepen your relationships too. Many people will need our service in different ways just as we need different people in our lives to help us with our own journey. There are many different ways to serve, so find something that you are passionate about and do it every day.

Nature

Nature has a way of grounding us and helping us feel more stable and secure about ourselves. Spending time in nature can help to reduce stress, improve mood, and increase creativity. Make time for nature every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Wake up early and go out to enjoy the sunshine. At night, you can take a walk after your meal to gaze at the moon and stars or just to enjoy the cooler air.

These are just a few of the many spiritual practices that you can do every day. Find what works best for you and make it a part of your routine. Spiritual practices can help you to live a more fulfilling and meaningful life and has many benefits:

Reduce stress and anxiety
Improve sleep
Increase self-awareness
Boost creativity
Improve relationships
Increase overall happiness and well-being

These spiritual practices are simple, easy to do, and can have a profound impact on your overall wellness.

Redesign and Transform Your Life One Step at a Time

Redesigning and transforming your life takes time and effort, but it is possible. Here are a few tips to help you get started:

Start small. Don’t try to change everything all at once. Start with one small change and build from there.

Be consistent. The key to success is consistency. Make a commitment to do your spiritual practices every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Be patient. Change takes time. Don’t get discouraged if you don’t see results immediately. Just keep at it and you will eventually see the changes you want.

Redesigning and transforming your life is a gradual, and sometimes painful, process. It is a process of learning and growing, of finding out your purpose and even dreaming of accomplishing things that are larger than yourself. Spiritual practices can help you on this journey and make the experience a more fulfilling and meaningful one. All you need to do is to do the best you can, one step at a time.

Featured Image: Original Photo by Warren Wong on Unsplash.

May

2023

The Chakras: Your Energy Centers

Reading Time: 6 minutes

The chakras are your energy centers. Most of us have heard about the chakras and may even be familiar with some of them. There are different models or concepts of the chakra systems. The most well-known chakra system has 7 energy centers and is mostly used in yoga exercises. Based on Human Design, there are 9 energy centers in the human body. This is because some of the chakras were split into 2 which expanded their meanings into more specific functions.

What are Chakras?

Chakra (cakra in Sanskrit) means “wheel” or disc that represents the energy points or energy hubs of the body. This is where you manage your own energy or life energy as well as the energies around you. The 7 main ones are located along the spine starting from the base up to the crown of the head. They are located in the astral body (or our energy body) and that is why we cannot see them or touch them. However, some people can feel them responding to certain stimuli or experiences at different points in their life journey.

Each chakra radiates its own color and energy and relates to specific aspects of our lives. They also coincide with specific glands or organs in the body. That’s why when they are blocked; we often experience illness in the specific organ related to it. This is why it is important to learn how to manage and balance your energy and how to protect yourself from unwanted external energy.

The 9 Chakras or Energy Centers

There are 9 energy centers in the Human Design Bodygraph which also includes the 7 chakras with 2 chakras split into 2. In Human Design, we have different energy types which depend on which energy centers are defined or open and through which energy channels they flow through. Your energy centers also help you fulfill your role in life based on your design.

Defined energy centers (colored in the Bodygraph) means that that energy center can provide you with consistent energy which you can rely on. Open energy centers (white in the Bodygraph) means that the energy is coming from outside and you can’t rely on it because it is not your energy.

HEAD CENTER (Pressure Center)

This is the top triangle in the bodygraph. It is where the mental pressure to think is located. It is also the center for inspiration, ideas and willpower. This center has the energy to think through your doubts and have an interesting perspective.

If it is open in your bodygraph, then this center takes on and amplifies the thoughts of others which can make you feel overwhelmed. It pressures you into doing things that are not actually your concern. To avoid this situation, you need to use your own personal strategy to evaluate which ideas are yours and which are from others.

AJNA CENTER (Awareness Center)

This is also called the Mind Center is the 2nd triangle in the bodygraph. It is the center for how you think, for ideas, conceptualization and analysis, as well as thoughts and insights. This allows you to feel confident about your opinions and have a consistent way of viewing information. This is also where the third eye is located.

When open, you will feel pressure to commit to a fixed opinion which may result in anxiety about the inconsistency of your opinions. This compels you to overcompensate by giving others an impression of certainty. However, you do not have to have a fixed opinion on anything. You can always keep an open mind and have a different perspective about things as you learn more.

THROAT CENTER (Manifestation Center)

The top square in the bodygraph and the center for communication and the manifestation of ideas. This is where all energy in the body is expressed, usually in a fixed and consistent way. This is why it is considered the center of manifestation, transmutation and transformation because whatever you say becomes reality.

If undefined or open, you can have an inconsistent voice. You can feel anxious before you feel pressured to speak. You maybe compelled to say or express something just to relieve the pressure on your throat. If this is you, then keep in mind that it is okay to pause and just listen. Don’t be pressured to fill the silence unless you really want something to say.

G CENTER (Identity Center)

The diamond on the bodygraph, it is the self center or identity center. It represents a fixed sense of self and expresses love in a stable and consistent way. It is also the center for guiding your direction in life.

When undefined, you feel inconsistent in your self and identity, compelling you to adapt to changing situations. You may feel that you need to hold unto a specific identity to get some sense of security. You may even suffer from “impostor syndrome”. Instead of trying to define yourself; don’t force yourself into a box and spend more time with people who are supportive of your insecurities and accept you for who you are.

HEART CENTER (Motor Center)

The small triangle on the bodygraph, it is a motor center as well as the center for ego, willpower and values. This is where you feel that you are making healthy commitments but it can also make you appear stubborn or assertive to other people.

An undefined heart center can make you feel pressured to prove yourself to others and to keep improving. This may also make you feel a lack of self-worth. Make sure that you don’t make promises that you’re not sure you can keep so you don’t burn out from doing things you don’t really want to.

SPLEEN CENTER (Awareness Center)

This is the left triangle on the bodygraph. It is the center for primal awareness, instinct, intuition, time consciousness and survival. The spleen center is connected to the lymphatic system and has its own sense of intuition. It functions to guide you in the moment. This is where your fight or flight instinct usually comes from.

When open, it can make you feel vulnerable and insecure, making you act impulsively. You may struggle with unhealthy behaviors including time-keeping. You may also find it hard to know when you need to let go of things. Learn to trust your own energy and intuition to help you know when to let go of things that no longer serve you. Try to create a system to help you manage your time and commitments better.

EMOTIONAL SOLAR PLEXUS CENTER (Awareness and Motor Center)

This is the right triangle in the bodygraph; a motor center and also the center for awareness and emotional energy. Your emotions come to you in waves which are also fluctuating. It takes you some time to make decisions because you need to process your feelings to avoid making rash decisions.

The undefined solar plexus center will absorb and amplify the emotional energy of others. You often try your best not to act or behave emotional so you can avoid conflict with others. Instead of dwelling on the highs and lows of the emotions you are experiencing; feel free to shake them off as they are not yours. Take time to release all the negative energy you have absorbed.

SACRAL CENTER (Motor Center)

The upper bottom square in the bodygraph. It is a motor center and the source of life force and reproduction. As a response motor, it regenerates through fulfilling activities.

An undefined sacral center has an inconsistent access to life energy and instead takes on and amplifies the sacral energy of those around them. This can result to being addicted to indulging in the sacral energies around you. You need to learn to recognize your limits so you don’t take in more energy than you can manage and avoid burnout.

ROOT CENTER (Pressure and Motor Center)

The lower bottom triangle, it is connected to the adrenal system, which means it is the center for adrenaline energy, adrenal pressure and stress. It moves energy in the body to fuel your activities such as exercise. This center provides consistent energy which compels you to be active throughout the day.

If undefined, it amplifies adrenal stress and pressures you to do things to keep you busy. This is why it is the center most often abused by the pressures of daily life; making us work more and forget to rest. You need to remember that the pressure to do something is normal but you don’t need to always say yes to that pressure. You need time to rest and relax to release the pressure so you can be more productive.

Get more information about your own energy centers by going to the Jovian Archive to get your body graph.

Featured Image: Original Photo by Karolina Grabowska.

May

2023

Redesign Your Life with Human Design

Reading Time: 5 minutes

We are all interested in self-discovery and personal transformation. That is why we often look to astrology and personality profiling tools. They help us learn more about ourselves and how we should act and behave in this world. Human Design is one such tool. Human Design can help you understand your unique energetic blueprint and guide you towards a more fulfilling life. This spiritual modality helps you gain insights into your strengths, challenges, and potential. With human design, you can learn to make decisions that align with your authentic self.

The Human Design System

Similar to astrology, determining your human design is based on your exact time, date and place of birth. This producers your personal Human Design Body Graph. This provides specific information about your personality, emotions, and energy centers among others.

Unlike astrology and other modalities however, it goes further. Your body graph is not just based on the placement of the planets at the time and place of your birth. The Human Design system is a mix of various other bodies of knowledge such as the Kabbalah, I’Ching, astrology, biochemistry, genetics, Myers-Briggs personality profiles and the different chakras. In this way, it is able to provide a more comprehensive and more specific information on how you can thrive and function well in the world.

Types and Strategies

Your human design body graph can look super complicated. A professionally-trained specialist will be able to give you so much information about your personal human design based on the graph. The two most important aspects of your chart is your human design type and strategy. Starting with these two aspects; you can already gain a lot of insights on understanding or your own personality and design.

The different types and strategies define how each individual is designed to interact with the world around them. There are four main types in Human Design base your energy type: Manifestors, Generators, Projectors, Reflectors, and Manifesting Generators which is a subtype of Generators. Each type has a specific strategy that helps them navigate through life with greater ease and fulfillment.

Manifestors

Manifestors are the initiators of action, with a powerful drive to create and shape their reality. As a Manifestor, you don’t really like being told what to do. You’re the type who can easily see the big picture. You usually start things but you don’t necessarily have to finish them. This is where the other types can come in and help you complete your goals. Your energy comes in powerful bursts. So it is important to rest in between doing your work. This is a time for you to enjoy some space and time alone to refresh yourself.

Your strategy is to inform others before taking action, so you avoid resistance and conflict as you move forward. You know your aligned with your design if you feel peace with what you are doing. On the other had, you will feel anger when you are doing things not aligned with your design.

Generators

Generators are the life force of the world, with a natural ability to create energy and abundance. As a Generator, you shine the brightest when you do things that excite you. So you need to learn to say “No” to things that don’t light you up. You have a regular energy cycle. This means you need to use up your energy throughout the day. You will have renewed energy from sleep for the next day. You are considered the “hustlers” of the world; designed to work on the things that excite you which you choose from the opportunities presented to you.

Unlike a Manifestor, you don’t initiate things. Instead, your strategy is to wait for a clear response from your gut before taking action. This ensures that you are using your energy in alignment with your true desires. You will feel satisfaction if you are acting based on your design. If you feel frustration, then you are not aligned with your design.

Manifesting Generators

Manifesting Generators are a hybrid of Manifestors and Generators, with the ability to both initiate action and respond to opportunities. With a blend of these two types, you can multitask more than others. This may be mistaken as a lack of focus but this is just the opposite. You are designed to expend your energy to your fullest each day following what you are passionate about. Your productivity and motivation may vary on a daily basis but a good night’s sleep will provide you the energy you need for the next day.

Your strategy is to follow your gut instinct and respond quickly to what feels right. This allows you to use your energy in the most efficient and effective way possible. As you move quite fast; part of your strategy is to inform the people around you of your next plan after you have responded to an opportunity presented to you. You will feel satisfaction when you live according to your design and frustration and/or anger when you are not aligned.

Projectors

Projectors are the guides and advisors of society, with a talent for seeing the potential in others. Similar to Manifestors, Projectors also experience an ebb and flow of energy. However, you are designed to work much fewer hours because you derive your energy from other people and don’t have much energy on your own. This means that you need resting times more often than the other types. This may often be mistaken as laziness or passivity but this is not true at all.

As a “non-energy being”, you don’t necessarily need to hustle but you get recognized for your efficiency at what you do. Your strategy is to wait for recognition and invitation before offering your guidance. This allows you to share your unique gifts and wisdom in a way that is valued and respected. This is how you can enjoy success. On the other hand, you may feel bitterness towards people and situations when you are not recognized.

Reflectors

Reflectors are the rarest energy type and are also “non-energy beings”. They serve as the mirrors of society, with a unique ability to reflect back the energy of the world around them. Your energy varies on a daily basis so you need to learn to rebalance your energy more than the other types. As a Reflector, you should focus on understanding your self and honing your own unique gifts. It is recommended that you wait a full lunar cycle (about 28 days) before making any major decisions. This allows you to gain clarity and avoid being influenced by outside energies.

When aligned with your design, you should feel delighted and appreciative of how unique each day of your life is. If you feel disappointment because you think you can’t keep up with the rest of the world; then you are out of alignment with your design. Remember that you are not supposed to keep up with other people.

By understanding your type and strategy in Human Design, your taking the first step to transform your life and redesign it in a way that honors your unique gifts and talents. You can learn to make decisions that are aligned with your true self and follow a path that leads to greater fulfillment and purpose. Whether you’re seeking personal growth, career success, or deeper relationships, Human Design can offer you a powerful roadmap for living an authentic and fulfilling life.

There are many places online where you can learn more about Human Design. You can always consult an expert to get more details about your own profile. In the meantime, you can start learning more about yourself by going to the Jovian Archive to get your body graph chart.

Featured Image: Original Photo by Jared Erondu on Unsplash.

Apr

2023

3 Signs That You Have Truly Forgiven Someone

Reading Time: 3 minutes

What are the signs that you have truly forgiven someone? Sometimes, we are not really sure. But we go ahead and we think and act like we have moved on. We will always remember the hurt and the pain. Forgiveness is truly hard.

After all, forgiveness is a choice but it is also a process. Making the choice does not come easily. The process is even more difficult. Here are some signs to help you determine whether you have truly forgiven and are truly moving on.

Forgive the Sinner, Forget the Sin

Can can think about the person in a neutral perspective instead of the hurt and pain they caused you? If yes, it is one sign that you have truly forgiven them.

We usually think of how someone has hurt us and made us suffer. Anger at that person is a normal initial reaction. Can you forgive the sinner and forget their sin against you? Then you are on your way to moving on.

It is said that the Master does not need to forgive because the Master understands. So the toughest test is if you can think positive thoughts about this person again. You may even gain a deeper understanding of why they acted that way towards you at that time.

No Grudge, No Need to Get Even

We usually want to retaliate and get our revenge on the person who hurt us. It may not be through our hands but through some other means. We just want to get even with them by wishing harm upon them.

However, if you have truly forgiven, then you will have the desire to take revenge anymore. You realize that harming them will also have consequences and may negatively affect the people around them. If you also hurt other people because of revenge; then you cannot call it forgiveness.

If you have truly forgiven them, then you will not wish them harm. You are no longer holding a grudge against them although you are not obligated to continue interacting with them. Instead, you will wish for them to succeed. You wish for them to become a better person. This way, they don’t end up hurting others like they hurt you.

Speak Without Judgment

As we all know, forgiveness is a process. It is a healing process that may sometimes require you to keep your distance from the person who hurt you. Avoiding them is your way to gather yourself together. You want to face the person and the hurtful situation in a less emotional state.

Time can fade old wounds. You come to a point where you can tell your painful story without blame, or anger. Most importantly, without judgment of the other person’s actions.

People who have truly forgiven can tell their painful stories without blame or shame. Instead, they highlight the valuable lesson they have learned from it. They show an acceptance of things as they are and not as somebody’s fault. They realize that they may also have had a fault in how the whole situation turned out as it did. Forgiveness also requires self-acceptance and taking responsibility for one’s action or inaction. It is a choice to let go so you can start to heal.

When you have truly forgiven, you not only let go of the hurt, blame and shame you felt for yourself. You do the same for the other person as well. You have expanded your understanding of how things unfolded and how the other person may have felt at the time. You realize that the other person had their struggles too. You accept that everyone contributed to the situation in one way or another but not intentionally.

Finally, you have truly forgiven someone, when you can also feel free to talk to them without judgment. You may even be capable of joking about the past experience. You are able to look at the goodness of the person and want to help them succeed in their goals.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Lina Trochez on Unsplash.

Mar

2023

“Rich Dad, Poor Dad” and Your Money Mindset

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Have you read the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad: What the Rich Teach Their Kids About Money — That the Poor and Middle Class Do Not! written by Robert T. Kiyosaki? This should definitely be on your list of books to read and learn from to improve your money mindset.

This book shows us a solution to getting out of the Rat Race, which Kiyosaki defines as a situation where people “work for the owners of their company, for the government paying taxes, and for the bank paying off mortgage and credit cards.” This scenario sums up most of our parents’ and our lifestyle in our 9-5 jobs. Kiyosaki proposes that we learn and practice investing as a solution to get out of this trap, retire early and live wealthier lives.

The book is full of great advise and real-life examples from the author’s own experience on how to go about investing. I will not be providing a summary of the lessons here. I think you should read the book yourself to get the full learning experience.

However, I will share some of the concepts in the book that had a great effect on me as it challenged a lot of my ideas about money and how to get rich. This book will definitely help you in transforming your money mindset into a wealth mindset.

Assets First, Luxuries Last

Most of us think that our homes are our greatest assets. Kiyosaki points out that this is the wrong way to think about assets. Assets are the things that generate income for you. If it doesn’t generate income for you, then it is a liability.

Assets include a business that generates income, an apartment that you have for rental or a car that you also lease out.

When you acquire a house or a car, unless you have them rented, these do not generate income for you. Instead, you spend more on them because you have to pay the mortgage and taxes that come with your purchase of the house or car. Thus, both of these items can be considered luxuries and you should only acquire luxuries when you have generated enough income from your assets to cover the expense of owning these items.

Pay Yourself First

Kiyosaki also stresses the concept of paying yourself first. This is an important aspects of having a good money mindset. You should have a budget for Financial Freedom and Savings. These are the portions of your budget that you should prioritize. Of course you should aim to be able to pay all your bills on time, but if money is short, you should prioritize paying yourself first.

He states that you are your greatest asset, especially your brain and body. So you should take care of your health and continue to educate yourself in order to maximize your knowledge and skills to pursue your goals. I could not agree more.

Most of us focus on working hard to gain wealth forgetting to take care of our health. In the end, we may succeed in acquiring wealth but we end up spending that on hospital bills to recover from our health issues instead of being able to enjoy our wealth for our goals such as buying a house, travel, running our own business, etc.

Always Look for Opportunities and Act on Them

Kiyosaki also advises that even when things look bad, you should always look for opportunities to turn around the situation. The way to do this is to use your creativity to think of solutions on the best way to handle the situation. This is how someone with a good money mindset will approach a seemingly negative financial situation.

A classic example is, if you feel you are not earning enough and you want to have your own business. You shouldn’t wait until you have saved enough to quit your job and start your business. Instead, keep your job, keep saving for your business and start it on the side while you are earning from your day job. This can be done more easily now with the rise of online platforms to start your online business.

The goal is to look for opportunities to earn more income without incurring major risks. If you quit your job to start your business, you will not have another source of income if the business venture fails or if it needs to be funded with more money. Most of us would commonly try to get a loan to fund a business but Kiyosaki discourages this.

Start Early, Learn Along the Way

One of the best advise in the book which I wished I had learned when I was young was to start early. Most of us already know that we should start saving for our retirement early. But we often do not think of investing early. Instead, what most of us do is start acquiring credit card debt or loans early on in our careers.

By starting early, he suggests not only learning to save early but investing in yourself early as well by taking classes that may not be useful in your main profession but will be useful to you when you start investing and start your own business.

By learning, he doesn’t only mean thru books but also seminars, classes as well as actually taking jobs and from mentors that would help you learn business skills such as in sales or marketing or how to work with and manage other people. These are all skills that you will need in order to work smarter, not harder and they will be useful when you finally start your own business.

Don’t Forget to Give

Kiyosaki encourages us to be greedy in our pursuit of building wealth but he does not mean doing so without taking into consideration our relationships with people in the process. That’s why he encourages that employers should get the best people to help them run their business and pay them what they deserve instead of focusing on how to cut costs. He shares that when his staff get a big paycheck, he feels happy because it means that his business is going to get big profits too.

He also encourages giving without the thought of getting something back. That’s why so many rich people make it a habit to contribute to their favorite charities or have created charitable institutions of their own. Being able to help others is a big part of having a good money mindset.

A simple form of this is to share your knowledge with other people. It is a great feeling when someone you shared your knowledge with comes back to you and tells you how it improved their life. In the process, you also gain new friends and expand your network for future opportunities.

It’s Never Too Late

This being said, it is not too late to start learning and investing and looking for opportunities to build your wealth. Kiyosaki provides several examples of people who started building their success after they have retired or after losing much of what assets they previously had.

As long as you have an open-mind, are willing to keep learning and are bold enough to go after opportunities as they come, then you will always spot opportunities to build your wealth. In the process you will keep honing your money mindset until you acquire a wealth mindset. The key word here is to build gradually instead of indulging in get-rich-overnight schemes. It may happen to a lucky few but it may not happen to you, so its better to do it slowly but surely as long as you keep on doing it.

Learn, earn, learn some more, earn some more. That’s how Kiyosaki did it since his younger years. He was lucky to have a rich dad and a poor dad who showed him contrasting beliefs and attitudes about money and wealth and he was able to learn from them. Now, we are lucky that he has provided us the chance to learn what he has learned and it is a great opportunity that we should not pass up.

Go and get the book yourself and start reading. I will be reading it again to see what nuggets I can learn that I missed before.

Updated. First published on Pinoy Smart Living as “Thoughts After Reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad” on 2018.07.31.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Joshua Mayo on Unsplash.

Feb

2023

5 Ways to Get Closer to Your Authentic Self

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Being true to ourselves is the foundation for getting closer to living as our authentic self. By knowing who we are; we can understand and connect more deeply with the people around us. However, in a world where perfection is seen as the ideal; this is a hard process to do. But if you want to live your best life; then the transformation is worth it. Here are 5 things you can do to get closer to being your authentic self.

1. Observe Your Self

This may sound a bit awkward or creepy even but this is one little step that will truly help you learn more about yourself. You have to allocate time to observe yourself. Who are you when you are alone and who are you when in the presence of others? You need to be able to differentiate the ‘you’ when you’re alone and your persona; the ‘you’ when you’re around others. You may even have different personas to interact with different groups of people in your social circle.

The only way to find out is to observe your own thoughts, actions and behavior in these different interactions. Of course, in order to get the best data so to speak; you need to be present in the moment. By being mindful of each moment and experiencing them to the fullest; you can gain the utmost satisfaction from each interaction and recall these experiences better too. That’s what will make you a better observe of your own actions.

2. Explore Your Strengths and Weaknesses

One thing you can do to get to know yourself better is to find out your own strengths and weaknesses. Do a SWOT analysis so you can better figure out these things about your self. This is an opportunity for self-reflection. Be honest in writing down your list. Take your time to contemplate on these aspects of your self.

Aside from just you, get the opinion of people around you. Other people will surely have different thoughts on this matter. So go around and ask everyone what they think of your strengths and weaknesses. If you have many different social circles; then you may get different answers or maybe consistent ones. Welcome all their feedback as it is a chance to see if there is a gap between your opinion of your self and other people’s impressions of you. Then you can better understand how far or close you are to your authentic self.

3. Name Your Emotions

Most of us are trained and have perfected the persona of looking and acting like we are strong in the face of challenges even when we really just want to cry. But because of this reaction, we often forget to fully feel our own emotions before we move on to damage control mode. So this time around, don’t just rush out of it.

Instead, take the time to feel your emotions in your body as they come until they pass or fade away. In the meantime, you may or may not need to cry. But as you are in this state of being, try to put a name to your emotions. Are you sad or frustrated, angry or just agitated? Don’t act on your emotions as they come, just feel them. This is best done when you are alone of course, but this process also helps you to calm down and gain better clarity on what action you need to take or not take, towards the situation.

4. Evaluate Your Values

Sometimes, we put ourselves in uncomfortable situations because we want to please the people around us, our loved ones included. Maybe you wanted to become a writer but your parents are pushing you to be an engineer instead. So now, you are trying your best to not get a failing grade in a course that you didn’t really want for your self. Maybe your passion lies in one of your hobbies and not in your job.

Evaluate your own values. You and your parents are from different generations and there maybe some values that you will both cherish and some in which you will differ. If you can identify what these are and why they are important to you, you will have an easier time making your loved ones understand why you need to follow the path you want to take. Everyone has their own journey to take. If we can honor our own path; then it will be easier for others to honor that part of ourselves as well. This will take us closer to living our authentic self.

5. Be Kind to Yourself

We are often told to be kind to others as everyone is going through their own struggles. So don’t forget to be kind to yourself as well. Don’t beat yourself up if you think you are going too slow. Sometimes, it takes a step back to see the road ahead with greater clarity. Just focus on taking each step consistently and love yourself each step of the way.

Being kind to yourself also means being able to accept your own shortcomings and weaknesses. It also means accepting your unique quirks and embracing all parts of you, even your shadow self. Although we are all striving for perfection; remember that we are all a work in progress and it is our imperfections that make us the interesting souls that we are. So pat yourself on the bag for the small victories and soothe yourself with hopeful thoughts whenever you fail at a challenge. Then, take a rest and try again.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Caroline Veronez on Unsplash.

Jan

2023

5 Eco-Friendly Alternatives for Your Daily Items

Reading Time: 2 minutes

There are many ways that we can help reduce environmental pollution. Eventually, a lifestyle change is needed if we really want to maximize our efforts. We all know that will take some time. In the meantime, we can start by using eco-friendly alternatives for our daily items.

Reusable Water Bottle

A reusable water bottle is the first eco-friendly alternative that we all should switch to right away. Make good use of them to replace disposable paper cups and having to buy mineral or distilled water in plastic bottles. Not only will you be saving money from buying less beverages when going outside; you can also help reduce the number of plastic bottles ending up in landfills and in the ocean. Remember, plastics are forever.

Reusable Straws

Since we’re talking about beverages, reusable straws are also easily available as a sustainable replacement to plastic straws. There are bamboo straws, metal straws, glass straws and even silicon straws for you to choose from. Bamboo straws are the most eco-friendly. Metal straws and glass straws come in a variety of colors and sizes to suit your needs. Silicon straws are more portable and convenient to pack for everyday use.

Rechargeable Batteries

Batteries can cause water and soil pollution when they get thrown into a landfill as they have many toxic chemicals as their main components. Use rechargeable batteries as an eco-friendly alternative. Aside from being more long lasting; they can also help you save on storage space and money since you don’t need to keep buying new batteries. You only need to recharge them every time they run out of power. Also, remember to dispose your electronic items properly to help reduce toxic contamination into the environment.

Natural Personal Care

A lot of the products we use for personal care have ingredients like microplastics that do not decompose and end up polluting the oceans and killing marine life. They may also contain chemicals that are toxic to the soil and can kill vegetation. If these can harm the environment; how can it not be harmful to our bodies as well? So on your next shopping run for personal care items, look for products with natural ingredients as they are also biodegradable. You can even create your own beauty remedies at home. There are many shampoo and conditioner bars that are great eco-friendly alternatives to bottled shampoo. They are also very convenient to pack when traveling.

Reusable Shopping Bags

Nowadays, eco bags are easily available as an eco-friendly alternative to plastic grocery bags and paper bags. Invest in a good eco bag that’s made of sturdy material such as canvas which are also washable. Or you can opt for one that’s easy to clean with just the wipe of a washcloth for grocery items that tend to be moist or wet. There are also biodegradable trash bags for lining your garbage cans at home. Plastic bags are one of the most common plastic wastes collected in landfills and making their way into the oceans, poisoning marine life.

These are just some of the item swaps that you can implement right away as your first step into a more sustainable lifestyle.

Feature Image: Original Photo by Anna Oliinyk on Unsplash.

Jan

2023

How to Stop Our Fast Fashion Addiction

Reading Time: 5 minutes

How to stop our fast fashion addiction? We all dream of having the wardrobe of our dreams. We want it filled with clothes that we want and need to suit our mood and for different occasions. However, we actually end up only using 20% of the clothes in our closet.

We only wear our clothes only 7 times in a year on average. Then, we forget them in the darkest corner of our closet or we discard them. The only exception to this are the clothes which we consider our favorites. Those ones we wear often and usually until they are all worn out.

Fast Fashion and Its Negative Effects

We may not realize it, but we’ve probably bought and dressed in a lot of fast fashion items. We see them on high-end runway shows. They then become available for purchase a few weeks later.

This is what fast fashion is all about. Its producing clothes faster than most people need to wear them. Its producing clothes in lesser quality, but more quantity. Cheaper imitations are also available for those who want an even lower price range.

Clothes are discarded at an alarming rate due to fast fashion. These go out of fashion really fast. New styles and designs are being displayed on the runways each week. This means people also have a new trend to follow. The environmental impact of this phenomenon is staggering.

The fashion industry generates 5% of the global greenhouse emissions through the materials used, manufacturing processes and freight operations.
Toxic chemicals are used to dye garments for faster and cheaper production.
Garment workers are forced to work in an unhealthy environment.
Clothes don’t last long so you constantly need to buy clothes; which is terrible for your budget.
It takes 20,000 liters of water to produce 1 kilogram of cotton.
4 trillion gallons of water are wasted on producing textiles and clothes. This is enough to fill 550 million Olympic-sized swimming pools.
57.1% of fashion waste end up in landfills; an average of 92 million tons of textiles waste produced every year.
Polyester, the most commonly used clothing fiber is made from plastic and will never fully decompose. It will break down into microplastics which can harm wildlife and emit carbon dioxide into the atmosphere for many years to come.
16 million tons of CO₂ emissions was generated by online returns of clothing in the US alone in 2020. This is equivalent to the emissions of 3.5 million cars on the road for a year.
Almost 10% of microplastics dispered in the ocean each year come from textiles.

Even with these statistics; it is estimated that fast fashion brands will be producing twice the amount of clothes today than they did in the past.

Tips to Reduce the Effects of Fast Fashion

Being aware of the negative impact of fast fashion enables us to do something about how we consume fashion. Fast fashion does not only mean clothes; it also includes the stuff that goes with it such as bags, shoes and other style accessories. Here are 5 things you can start doing to help reduce the negative effects of fast fashion.

Buy Less, Buy 2nd Hand, Shop Your Closet

We have more clothes in our closet than we actually need so the first step is to buy less. Instead, shop your closet for what you can wear. Then shop for the items you need from 2nd hand shops or thrift shops where you may even spot classic styles and great vintage finds. You can even swap clothes with your friends or rent them for when the occasion calls for it. Yes, you may have to stay out of being on trend but there is no need to follow fashion trends anyway. At least you’re now taking the right path to a better environment.

Buy Sustainable, Buy Quality Over Quantity

Buy your clothing items from brands who focus on sustainability and quality rather than what’s on trend. Sustainable brands are not always expensive. Better still, buy from local brands to lessen transportation costs and emissions. If you can afford luxury brands then go for them as they ensure quality, which means your clothes will last longer. More importantly, make sure you buy classic styles so you never have to worry about going out of style. A little black dress is always fashionable for most occasions. It also comes in a unique variety of styles so you can choose your very own unique style or have it altered to suit your taste.

Don’t Throw Away: Repair, Recycle, Donate or Sell

Instead of contributing to the number of clothes in the landfill, use your sewing kit or sewing machine to repair torn or damaged clothes. Or give other people an income by having a professional repair it for you or alter it to update or “upcycle” it to suit your needs. You can donate your clothes to your family, friends or charitable institutions who need them. You can also sell them on 2nd hand shops in your area or online. Start decluttering your closet and see which clothes you can repair, recycle, donate or sell. Audit your wardrobe and see if you have the must-have closet staples which you can use for many, different occasions. Remember, there are ways to look expensive even on a budget.

Follow Washing Instructions and Use Sustainable Products

If you use a washing machine, pay attention to the washing instructions for different types of clothing. Different clothing materials need different settings for washing so they will maintain their quality longer. Also, look for organic or natural products to use in your washing so you are sure that they are biodegradable and won’t add even more chemicals to your clothes or the environment. If you have laundry shops do the washing for you; look for ones that use sustainable washing products as well.

Find Your Personal Style, Declutter and Try A Capsule Wardrobe

One of the major reasons why people buy fast fashion is because you get a sense of belonging to a group of people who share the same style preferences as you. However, we must never forget that each of us has our unique sense of taste and style which makes us attractive to others even if we are not wearing the latest trend in fashion. We can only highlight our own unique, personal sense of style by getting to know ourselves better. If we know ourselves better; we can be confident to express ourselves in many ways, including our fashion choices. Once you know your own style, it will be easier for you to declutter your closet and shop for your new wardrobe. You can even create your own capsule wardrobe. This will still allow you to express your style in whatever season or occasion.

Once you start thinking differently about how your style choices affect the environment; you will naturally dress differently. You become mindful of the things you do and the choices you make. As you start to dress different; you also start to think differently. With each better choice, you can grow closer to living a life that serves your overall wellness as well as that of your larger environment.

Feature Image: Original Photo by The Nix Company on Unsplash.