IQ and EQ play significant roles in our overall success in life. Our IQ indicates our level of intelligence while our EQ shows our ability to handle and control our emotions.
There are many available standardized tests online if we want to find out our IQ score. Some of us may not get a high score but that shouldn’t make us feel small. Although having a high IQ will give one an advantage; it is not a guarantee for success. It only measures our potential for success. In fact, studies reveal that our EQ is more important than our IQ. Statistics show that about 90% of successful individuals have high emotional intelligence as compared to only 20% who have high IQ.
So, how do you know if you have high emotional intelligence? Here are signs that indicate that you have high EQ.
1. You Pause
Have you ever regretted saying some things as soon as you say them? For example, when you blurt out hurtful words when you’re angry. The ability to stop and think first before saying anything and to control your temper are easier said than done. These are skills that only high EQ individuals usually do.
2. You are Difficult to Offend
Do you know of highly sensitive individuals who get easily offended? It is difficult to be around them because it is like always walking on eggshells. You need to be careful with your words and actions at all times so as not to offend them. Well, the opposite is true with highly emotionally intelligent people. If you can handle criticism well and you understand humor and let other people make jokes about you without being offended, then that is a sign of having a high EQ.
3. You Own Up to your Mistakes
Instead of looking for excuses or blaming somebody else for their mistakes, emotionally intelligent people apologize when they are wrong. They own up to their mistakes and will be responsible in correcting them. They know when and how to apologize properly and keep their word of not doing the same thing again.
4. You have Good Social Skills
A large part of emotional intelligence is dealing well with other people. Thus, if you have a high EQ, it is only natural that you have lots of friends from diverse backgrounds. You are capable of rotating around different social circles. You have a way of connecting and dealing with others that they enjoy being with you too.
5. You are Open-Minded
Being open-minded means you are willing to listen and accept other people’s views and opinions about things. It means that you have the ability to remove your personal biases and prejudices from discussions. Open-minded individuals also know how to deal with arguments. If discussions get too heated up; you know when to “agree to disagree” and not take the disagreement too personally. You can even remain friends with the person you have the disagreement with.
6. You are Self-Aware
Self-awareness is being able to know your “self” and have a clear understanding of who you are; what your personality is, what your strengths and weaknesses are and what your thoughts and beliefs are. You understand your feelings and know how to control them. This means that you know what things can trigger you emotionally, so you are able to stay away from them or diffuse the situation, if needed.
7. You are a Good Judge of Character
You have the ability to understand other people. Your high EQ means that you can tell what they are feeling and where they are coming from. Thus, you can easily assess other people’s character and you can tell whether they are being truthful or not. In short, you can almost read others like an open book.
8. You Don’t Hold Grudges
A grudge is negative emotion resulting from a past event. A highly emotionally intelligent person knows that holding grudges will only cause undue stress. Letting go does not necessarily mean forgetting what happened. It just means not dwelling on negative emotions to help you feel better.
9. You Control Your Thoughts
Your thoughts affect your perception of reality. You might have heard of the mind-body connection which means that your thoughts even affect your physical body. Your thoughts strongly affect your emotions too. If you dwell on negative thoughts, your life will have many negative experiences too. An emotionally intelligent person knows that the mindset affects the direction of one’s life. Instead of thinking negative thoughts, they develop good habits to have a more positive mindset. This means that they will also be attracting more positive experiences into their life.
10. You Fail and Rise Again
Emotionally intelligent persons are not afraid to fail. They understand that failure is part of success. What is important is that they rise up again and again each time they fall. Individuals with high EQ understand that the journey is just as important as the destination. That’s why you should your best to enjoy each moment and have fun in your life even as you keep your focus on the end goal.
If you scored 5 and above, then that is a sign that you have a high EQ. You have what it takes to be successful in life despite all the challenges that life throws at you. If your score is low, don’t feel bad. The good news is that emotional intelligence can be developed. It is an important part of nurturing your emotional wellness. What is important is that you are now aware of your limitations and hopefully, this will lead you to increase your desire to learn and grow your emotional quotient.
Updated. First published on Pinoy Smart Living on 2019.09.04.
Featured Image: Original Photo by Hello I’m Nik on Unsplash.
